Dreaming of You
by KaiaLuna
Summary: Nothing is as important to Bella as the friend she's found in Alice. She loves her, loves Edward, loves the whole family. They are the future she wants so what life is dreaming of? Who is the man, the family, that haunts her dreams, cloaked in shadows? Dreams are important, they reveal the secrets we're afraid to face, the truth that changes everything.
1. Chapter 1

The half remembered dream startled her awake. She'd had the same one since that first day of school, when she wasn't dreaming about Edward and the mystery surrounding him. Mystery solved and her relationship with the vampire sound, the mystery dream seemed to be taking over, though she could never quite remember it upon waking.

Tired, she gratefully poured the cup of coffee Charlie had left her when he'd gone to work and ignored the brief flirtation her mind had of eating any breakfast. A knock on her door startled her and mug of coffee left on the table she went to let Alice in, "I forgot." She told her new friend, "Sorry."

"Are you alright Bella? Only Jasper says you've been feeling a bit… down and we've been planning this trip to Seattle all week."

"No, no, I'm fine, just tired and um, I miss my mom, that's probably what he's feeling."

Alice observed her for a few minutes before nodding slowly in agreement, "OK, well why don't you get ready and you can nap in the car while I drive, unless you don't want to go any more. I'm sure I can just order a dress online."

"No, I want to go." Bella forced a smile, "Really, just give me a minute to get ready."

"Great." Alice beamed at her and Bella hurried up the steps to get dressed, she'd promised to go with Alice to Seattle for the weekend. Alice wanted to find the perfect dress for Prom since it would be on the anniversary of her meeting Jasper and since Bella was human, they were all planning to attend this year."

"Alice?" Bella asked in the car.

"Hm?"

"Did you and Jasper get married the same day or something, is that why it's such an important anniversary?"

"Jasper and I aren't married." Alice frowned at her.

"Oh, I just, I mean, I assumed, I'm sorry."

"It's ok." Alice sent her an almost sad smile, "I do love him, that's why this anniversary is important, we celebrate being together every decade and this is our fifth but we're," Alice sighed, "It's easier to let everyone believe we are what we aren't, I mean the family all knows of course and we are together but, well, Jasper and I aren't mates."

"What?" Bella practically jumped in her seat.

Alice chuckled, "Like I said, the family knows and he and I have never been married but we are companions so its just easier to let people believe we're a couple instead of best friends who sometimes take physical comfort in each other. I didn't mean to keep it secret from you or anything, actually I figured Edward would have told you when he told you about each of us."

"He didn't, well I mean he did but only very little, he said it was all your stories to tell. I've only ever heard about his and Carlisle's past."

"Oh." Alice seemed genuinely surprised, "How very… Edward of him." She sighed and sent a smile, "He can be very sensitive, really he's just so very private and doesn't like to talk about others because his insight into our thoughts can get muddled with what is said and he hates the idea he might betray someone's confidence, especially the ones he's got from our heads and not our mouths." Alice sent a smile to her, "I suppose that's a bit convoluted and confusing, needless to say, it was just very… Edward, of him not to say."

Bella nodded, unsure what to add, "I'm sure it's hard for him, knowing the things he does."

"It is." Alice agreed, "It can be hard for us both knowing some things even when we maybe shouldn't know them."

"I'm so sorry Alice." Bella had never thought too much on the burden of their gifts, "Jasper too, it must be so difficult."

Alice nodded and sent her a sad smile, "It's even harder for him sometimes, before we met, well we were both sort of alone in it, me especially, Jasper, he saved me, even before he knew me, he was my beacon, a rock I held onto. I owe him everything, he'd tell it different of course."

"What do you mean?"

"When I woke to this life, I remembered nothing, just darkness and the burning, my name and that there was no one, that I was alone, that I'd been alone a long time."

"Oh Alice." Bella wished she could hug the pixie vampire but she was still driving.

Alice sent her a sad smile before focusing back on the road and continuing, "I had a vision, it scared me so much, then I had another and another. I saw people approaching, I saw me killing them, I saw the Cullen's. It took me a long time to teach myself their ways but I worked so hard at it, all the time and I knew, I knew one day I'd find them and we'd be family because besides my name, I knew, without a doubt that my visions were real. I held the visions of the Cullen's and that hope very closely, knowing one day I'd be with them, but I never went looking for them. I was afraid, being alone, but the visions of Jasper, of meeting him, of loving him came too and I saw that in all the images of the Cullen's Jasper was with me and I knew I needed him first. I was still afraid, that my visions made me a freak, that I wouldn't be wanted, all I could do was have faith in those visions but I was so alone Bella, a freak even to my own kind. Then I met him. I was so excited in the diner, I didn't have time to be nervous or afraid he wouldn't like me because I saw that he would, that once I met him, I would never have to be alone again. I held onto that, even more than the Cullen's, for ninety years he's been my rock and from that day, fifty years ago, he's made sure I'm safe and happy and never ever alone, especially in the dark." She laughed, "A vampire who sees perfectly at night and I'm still afraid to be alone in the dark."

"Alice." Bella's eyes were brimming with tears as she reached over and took her friend's hand, squeezing it with all her strength.

"Like I said," Alice turned to smile at her, "I owe him everything. That day in the diner changed my life, he showed me friendship and even love and together we found the Cullen's. Sometimes I wish I loved him like that, in the forever way of Carlisle and Esme but I don't and he doesn't love me like that. He's my very best friend, over the years we have taken physical comfort in each other but its more… emotional than physical or even mental compatibility." She smirked at me, "Jasper and I don't have very much in common, I'm sure you noticed."

"I just, I thought, you seem, well so much in love."

"We are, it's just not that kind of love." Alice explained. "Jasper doesn't just know my every emotion Bella, he knows everything behind every emotion, I tell him everything and he tells me everything, even the things he doesn't like to talk about. I think we know each other better than we know ourselves and that kind of bond, its rare, especially between those who aren't mates, I suppose its why we come off as mates."

"So you aren't even a couple?"

Alice shrugged, "I guess we are, I mean, we're companions. We do everything together, share everything, we are even physical sometimes, I just mean we aren't mates, so we never married and one day, hopefully, we'll be so lucky to find our soul mates and then I'll get another sister and I just know, even if I haven't _seen_ it, that I'll love her just as much as Rosalie and you and we'll be the best of friends, all of us, we'll be a family and take care of each other always."

"Family's really important to you." Bella whispered in thought.

"I never had one, not that I can remember. That's partly why it's hard to not be so… enthusiastic, about our friendship, it's so real to me, even though it's a bit new for you, like with Jasper at the diner, I just can't help it, knowing someone is going to be so important to me and finally meeting them, getting to know them in real life, its hard to give them the time to catch up. I was like that with the Cullen's too, they were my family long before I was theirs."

"You don't have to try with me Ali." Bella sent her a warm if still slightly sad smile, "I might be playing catch up on getting to know you but you're already the best friend I ever had."

Alice shot her a wide smile, venom glistening in her eyes, "You always seem to understand us Bella, to accept us, even at our strangest."

"Well its fair since you all accept me, even at my clumsiest." Bella tried to lighten the mood not used to the normally exuberant pixie being so somber.

"Yes well it does keep things interesting having to hold our breaths if you stumble just in case." She laughed.

"So where does the torture," Bella laughed, "I mean shopping begin."

Alice sent her a mock glare, "Just for that I'm making you try on a couple things I know you wont buy or look fantastic in."

"Oh no." Bella fake groaned, "You already make me try on too much."

Alice just laughed and pulled the car into a parking spot, "Come on, you'll have fun, I promise."

Despite herself, Bella did enjoy shopping with Alice. The clothes were usually way to expensive and not what she'd normally choose but they looked good, no they looked great and Bella always felt more confident in them.

True to her word Alice made her try on a few things she wouldn't look fabulous in and though it was difficult to make Alice look anything but adorable and gorgeous, she tried on some truly heinous dresses as well, making the two girls laughter ring through the dress shop as they pranced about and played.

The bags were mostly sent ahead to the hotel and Alice took Bella out to dinner at a diner. Shocked they weren't at a fancy place Bella turned to Alice as the girl slid into a booth.

Alice shrugged, "I have a fondness for old diners. It's a Jasper thing."

Bella laughed and nodded, "Sentimental from meeting him in one?"

"Yes." Alice nodded, "He also loves the smell of coffee and likes to people watch." Alice grinned, "Jasper comes up with the best stories about the people that go by, he knows their emotions of course and comes up with whole stories about them. Sometimes, when we're in the city, we'll spend Sundays walking around and find an old diner and spend hours people watching. They're some of my favorite memories from our decades together and I can't help but like the smell of coffee even though I sort of think it stinks and have a fondness for these old diners. It's like, cowboy boots, pickup trucks and thunderstorms, not things I care for at all but so very Jasper that I have a strange fondness for them too."

Bella nodded, "Well I'll have to thank Jasper then because I'm much more comfortable eating here than at the other places I can imagine you'd bring me."

"I know." Alice smiled, "That's why I picked this place."

Alice ordered a coffee and Bella a burger with fries and a coke. Alice smiled indulgently and sniffed at the coffee wrinkling her nose a little in distaste even as a small smile teased the corner of her mouth. After eating they went to a movie, a chick flick, but like shopping Bella had a surprisingly good time with Alice, laughing and even awing at the corny bits.

While Bella slept Alice opened all their bags and removed tags before packing everything up and then reading until morning. She showered and ordered room service before waking Bella and after checking out of the hotel she drove them back to Forks, a bit slower than she normally drove, enjoying the easy conversations as the two girls got to know each other better.

At the Cullen house, they found the family all gone out, Bella was a little disappointed but Alice pointed out that Edward probably thought they'd use both days to shop and not be back before night.

"Stay though." Alice insisted.

"Are you sure you aren't bored of me yet?" Bella half teased.

"Never." Alice grinned, "Besides you know I hate to be alone."

"I thought that was a dark thing."

"No, well yes, its worse in the dark but I hate being by myself any time. Please Bella."

"Of course." Bella hugged her friend and let her lead her up to her room.

"Besides," Alice laughed, "I need to show you how to wear a few of these outfits and make up, you have to let me do your make up." So it was Bella Barbie began and as usual, even the things she didn't usually enjoy were made fun with Alice and they played dress up for hours.

When the family came home, Bella was wearing ripped faded jeans and a cream corset top with cowboy inspired caramel colored ankle boots and Alice was wearing a mini skirt with sky high shoes and a shockingly demur white lace top.

"You ladies look lovely." Carlisle complimented them both.

He smiled indulgently at Alice as she squealed and grabbed Rosalie and Esme's hands, "You need to dress up too!"

Bella laughed after her, "Why?"

"We look to good to waste this!" Alice told her indignantly.

"So Esme and Rosalie dressing up will make your efforts on me less of a waste?"

"No," Alice laughed, "Them dressing up will make it a party silly!" Alice grabbed her arm and wrapped it with hers, "Come on we'll all make an entrance."

"I'm not changing again." Bella huffed, pretending exasperation.

"Of course not, you look stunning." Alice agreed, "We can still make an entrance."

"Didn't we technically just do that though?"

"No." Alice insisted tugging her up the steps.

Esme laughed as Alice tore through her closet and tossed clothes at her and then came out with boots, "Don't pick that Rosalie, please… oh yes much better and then come do Esme's hair, oh and Bella's too, I'm going to pick us all jewelry!" She clapped and disappeared. Rosalie shook her head after the pixie but disappeared before returning only a minute later in a black sweater dress with the most beautiful red shoes that had the tallest and thinnest heal Bella had ever seen, it made her legs look miles long in the short skirt of the dress and when she turned around Bella saw there was a cowl neck type back open to her waist leaving her perfect white back bare. It was Esme that really shocked Bella though, she looked… young, and hot in her dark jeans, healed black boots and the shirt, it was black and a halter and its neckline was cut almost to her belly button. Bella gaped at her mother figure seeing her at her true physical age of mid twenties for the first time.

Esme grinned at her, "You can borrow the top anytime, it would look wonderful on you."

Bella shook her head, "I don't think I could pull that off." Rosalie snorted and motioned to a chair, "Um you don't have to do my hair."

"Yes she does." Alice called from the hall, "Sit Bella."

Bella rolled her eyes and moved to the chair, "Thanks."

"I don't mind." Rosalie shrugged and began to run her fingers through Bella's hair before settling on a half up, half down pulled to the side look. It only took seconds and Bella would have been impressed if it had taken an hour.

Within ten minutes the four women were walking back down the stairs, Bella noticed all the men had changed and were wearing similar jeans and tee shirts outfits. Carlisle, looking his young age as much as Esme, was in dark jeans and a black tee with black boots, Emmett in black jeans and a charcoal gray shirt that was pulled up to his elbows. Jasper was in cowboy boots, making Bella fight a smirk from Alice's words the day before, his jeans were faded and worn comfortable looking and he wore a white long sleeved shirt. Edward, looked the most like himself, in dark jeans and a button down shirt rolled to his elbows.

Bella blushed as he bowed slightly and offered an arm, "Um, thanks." She took it and let him lead her into the family room, "Now what?" She asked turning to Alice.

"It's a party." Alice grinned at her, "We have fun."

"Oh kaaay?" Bella nodded still watching her friend.

Alice laughed, "Games Bella, we play games, we sing and dance and generally just have fun so relax, it's a _party_." She stressed the word making Bella laugh.

"So what game do we play that's semi fair for the human then?"

"Charades!" Emmett suggested bouncing and making Rosalie roll her eyes though Bella thought she saw the beautiful blonde hiding a smile and thought maybe she wasn't so uptight after all. Why then did she pretend to be a bitch?

"Girls against boys!" Alice shouted making Emmett groaned, "No fair, I wanted you on my team."

"You get Edward and Jasper." Alice rolled her eyes.

Emmett grinned, "Right, yup, ok girls against boys."

Alice rolled her eyes and turned to Bella, "Edward and I are never allowed on the same team in any game anyways."

Bella nodded in understanding, "Seems like you need three teams though since whoever gets Jasper gets an extra boost."

"I know." Alice agreed nodding, "I usually get him on my team of course."

Bella nodded biting back a laugh, "Of course you do."

"It does depend on the game though." Esme smiled warmly at her, "Charades is one of them so I hope you're good at it."

"Eh." Bella shrugged and blushed, "Not so much."

"Its ok Bella, we'll do great!" Alice reassured her making Emmett groan.

"Shall we then." Carlisle motioned to the coffee table and Bella was surprised to see a bowl with papers sitting in it already there.

"Who goes first?"

"Carlisle of course." Alice told her as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Right." Bella frowned nodding, maybe because he was the patriarch.

"Why me?" Her thought was interrupted by his question.

"So you can teach Bella, she's never played before, she's going to whisper it to Esme for pointers when we start." Alice shrugged.

Bella laughed blushing again, "Ok, so I've never played but I catch on quick."

"Yup." Alice nods in agreement.

True to her word the girls team did alright but the boys won by two points. After charades Alice insisted they play Honey I Love You and went about explaining the rules of the game she'd discovered on the Internet. "So one person goes in the middle and says 'honey I love you wont you please give me a smile' to one person and tries to make them smile and that person has to not smile and say 'honey I love you but I just can't smile' only I think we should make it laugh not smile.

Emmett volunteered to go first and turned to Bella, "honey I love you wont you please give me a laugh'."

Bella shook her head biting back the urge to laugh at his puppy dog face, "Honey I love you but I just can't laugh." On the word laugh he was fluttering his lashes and pouting and she couldn't help but laugh. With a victory shout Emmett thrust his fist in the air and danced around the circle.

Bella laughed again shaking her head, "Ok, my turn I guess." She said stepping into the circle and spinning around slowly looking at each of them. Deciding Emmett would be the easiest she walks towards him, "honey I love you wont you please give me a laugh?"

Emmett scoffed and shook his head, "honey I love you but I just can't laugh."

"You can," Bella nodded with a grin, "You see I fell down in Seattle and landed in the lap of an old man because Alice was distracted by his cowboy boots, smiling and licking her lips, they were remarkably like Jasper's." Emmett snickered, "You know I think she has a thing about riding cowboys or something." He let out a loud laugh at that or at the bright blush Bella was sporting as she flounced back to her spot.

Emmett shook his head as he walked into the middle and turned to his wife, "honey I love you wont you please give me a laugh?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes, "honey I love you but I just can't laugh, besides I've had plenty of practice, you should have picked someone else."

Emmett snorted, "I can get you to laugh, I know it. It's my gift, it's why you love me because I am your big cuddly snuggy bear." Snickers were heard around the room and they could see Rosalie fighting a smile. Emmett growled and lifted his arms, "Snuggy bear will make you laugh because you love him!" He pretend to charge her making her spit out a laugh and then bite her lip pretending to glare at him as he shouted in triumph.

"Alright, snuggy bear." Esme snickered, "Let your wife have a turn."

Emmett grinned at her, not embarrassed in the least as he danced his victory dance to his spot and Rosalie entered the circle. She turned on Esme, "Really Esme, you should know better than to pick on my husband, now honey I love you wont you please give me a laugh?"

Esme shook her head with a smile, "honey I love you but I just can't laugh and you my lovely daughter wont make me."

Rosalie snorted and rolled her eyes, "Do you remember that time I won a bet with Edward and he had to dress in your panties and wear them all day at school?"

Esme snickered but didn't laugh, "Funny at the time, true but you really shouldn't pick on your brother."

Rosalie fought a smile as she pretended to glare at her mother, "It was even funnier when it was Carlisle who had to do surgery in your lace thong and we caught him dancing in the hall trying to get it out of his butt."

Esme snickered and then laughed, perfect recall didn't help them with this game, not at all. She held up her hands, "Ok, ok, you win."

Rosalie smirked at her and spun flaunting back to her husbands side while Esme stepped in the middle still smiling widely and giggling a little. Carlisle looked a little embarrassed but was smiling good-naturedly. Esme followed in Bella's example and turned slowly eying each of them in the circle before choosing her victim and stepping up to Alice, "honey I love you wont you please laugh."

Alice ginned, "honey I love you but I just can't laugh."

"Really?" Esme mused, "That's a shame, we should have maybe taken photos for you when we pulled the same stunt on Jasper two decades ago and had him off hunting in your frilly pink satin nighty."

Alice snickered biting back a laugh, "I don't need a picture, I could wheedle him into wearing something similar in bed."

Bella choked back a laugh looking from Alice to Jasper and blushing brightly, "Now that just ain't true." Jasper spoke up with a frown.

"Oh hush baby, no one cares if you like to wear my panties." Alice fluttered her lashes at him and Esme burst into giggles. Alice rounded on her with a wide grin, "Give it up momma, I will not be broken."

"Maybe he's the one who likes riding cowboys." Emmett snickered.

Through her giggles Esme shook her head and tried one more time, "Maybe I picked the wrong person, then again, I recall you being unable not to laugh when…" She turned to Jasper, "My darling boy remember that time your principle thought Alice was the beard for your and Edwards secret relationship and had you sit down for a talk on morality before feeling you up and offering an ear to come to whenever you needed… release from your tensions and immoral thoughts?"

Alice snickered and then laughed, "Not fair, that's not fair, he's still all awkward about that proposition and who can't laugh at the major being all uncomfortable because some little human hit on him."

"She wasn't little and was oddly imposing and very inappropriate." Jasper huffed. "Her lust was powerful and terrifying and I couldn't seem to run away."

Alice laughed again shaking her head, "She was barely taller than me, weighed a buck ten at most, not to mention she was completely human and you refused to go back to school." Alice giggled.

"She licked my pencil." Jasper growled rolling his eyes, "it was… icky."

Bella snickered and fought the giggle, "Icky?" They were all chuckling now.

"Ok, ok, pixie, go." He rolled his eyes playing at being angry but amusement shone in his eyes and out through his gift, "I should have gotten points for not just eating her." He added grumbling, much to Emmett's infectious amusement.

Alice danced into the middle of the circle and spun around gracefully before settling on Edward, "honey I love you wont you please give me a laugh?"

"Honey I love you but I just can't laugh." Edward responded with an amused twinkle in his eyes.

Alice grinned mischievously at him, and he seemed to be fighting a laugh as he read her thoughts passing over one idea to another before finally speaking, "Jasper and Emmett naked in the pond."

Edward choked, sputtered and then laughed while both of his brothers looked confused.

"What did I miss?" Esme frowned.

"Yeah, share." Bella insisted.

"Nothing." Alice grinned, "It was just a fantasy some girl had in school about Jazzy and Emmett together." She danced back to her spot and sent Edward a gloating grin at having got him.

"Why I told you about that." He said shaking his head.

"Come on, pick someone." Esme urged enjoying herself.

"Well my father, I believe it's your turn." Edward turned to Carlisle, "Since I love you honey wont you please give me a laugh?"

"Honey I love you but I just can't laugh and you have nothing on me son."

"I have everything on you father you just know I wont use any of it…" he smirked, "except..." Edward turned slowly looking around the room before focusing back on Carlisle, "There is of course that time you and I came back early from a hunt and found Emmett singing Dancing Queen, complete with dance moves."

"Hey I was trying to get Rosalie to not be mad at me!" Emmett protested.

Carlisle smirked but didn't crack, "I remember."

"Or the time, before the rest of the family joined us, we were in Chicago and that nurse propositioned us… together."

Carlisle fought back a widening smile, "I'm not sure who was more appalled, you or my patient who overheard in the next room."

"You're good Carlisle." Edward smirked at him, "But can you not laugh when you remember Emmett, Jasper and I dressing up and singing YMCA to get Esme to forgive us for her garden."

Carlisle bit back the laugh but couldn't help the chuckle that broke his control and Edward laughed with him, "Hah!" He gloated heading back to his spot beside Bella. "You're up."

"I should get you back but no one seems ready to take the challenge here so Jasper my boy, its on." Carlisle laughed squaring off on his son, "Honey I love you, wont you please laugh?"

"With all the amusement in the room you might overestimate me but then again, I do hate to lose so honey I love you, I just can't laugh."

He projected calm and serenity into the room making Carlisle shake his head, "No cheating son."

"Just giving myself a fair chance." He smirked with a shrug, "Their laughter makes me giddy."

"I know." Carlisle smirked at him, "Do any of you recall the day I threw away the 'junk' collected, which happened to be samples Esme was using to decorate our house? She was so very angry, I do believe it is where the YMCA idea came from after all," They had all started snickering, "Of course I was in my bug costume at the time but it went something like this…" He smirked and winked at his wife before swaying his hips, moving his feet and starting to sing "Love Bug" Everyone was laughing at that point and Carlisle stopped, pointing at Jasper, "I am the master!" He laughs.

Jasper rolled his eyes, still laughing "Ok you win. I just wish I had been around for that one in person."

"He really was dressed like a love bug." Esme chuckled, "Antennae with hearts and everything." Carlisle chuckled and pulled her into his arms for a kiss.

"You're up Jazz." Alice shoved him towards the middle and he sent out a wave of amusement and giddy joy making them all giggle. "No gifts!" She giggled, shoving him towards the middle again.

"Hm," Jasper eyed all of them carefully, "Who Pixie?"

"Bella." She jumped clapping. "Make Bella laugh."

"I'm too easy." Bella fought a smile and blush.

"If that were true you wouldn't be a virgin." Emmett teased make her blush brilliant red.

Jasper lifted a surprised brow at her, "Nothing to be embarrassed about for bein a lady Bella it's a rare and special thing in this age."

Bella blushed deeper at the compliment, "You're supposed to make her laugh not blush." Emmett teased.

"Well in that case, all I really need darlin, is that pretty laugh." Bella blushed brighter at his words as he stepped closer and almost whispered, "Honey, I love you wont you give me a laugh."

Bella shook her head, fighting her heartbeat as she responded in a shaky voice, "Honey I love you but I just can't laugh."

"Oh but I think you can Darlin. I think you've a beautiful laugh, like warm whiskey used to taste, burning your throat and making your voice husky." Bella blushed deeper, "Ali's laughter is more like bells, it reminds me of happy bluebirds twittering about and playing." Bella smiled picturing Alice and nodded at him in agreement. "Everyone is laughing and merry and having fun but you won't laugh for me darlin so I'll tell you a secret to get back at you."

"Oh?" Bella looked up at him with a confused but intrigued smile.

Jasper leaned a little closer his voice low, "My fine upstanding brother here once laid one on my other brother, right on the lips." Bella snorted the laugh she was holding back. "Pete swears Eddie tried to slip him the tongue too." Bella let out a giggle and Jasper danced back with a wink as Bella turned to Edward with a raised eyebrow still giggling.

"There was no tongue and I lost a bet to Emmett."

"You lost a bet to Emmett and he made you kiss him." Bella giggled looking at Emmett in question.

Emmett through up his hands, "Not me, Peter, Jasper's brother from his life before us."

Bella nodded and turned back to Edward, "So how was it?"

Edward rolled his eyes at her, "There was no tongue."

"Uh huh." Bella nodded with a giggle.

"Ok, Bella, last round, make one of us laugh." Alice clapped.

"I already went."

"I went twice." Emmett shrugged, "Come on Bells! I was too easy."

"I'm sure Rosalie says that all the time." To her surprise Rosalie snorted and laughed making Bella smile at her, and even more surprisingly, the blonde smiled back at her.

"Come on Bella." Rosalie nodded to the center, "Last round and you can pick the next game."

"Ok, um." Bella stepped forward and looked to each of them carefully and then smirked, "Honey I love you, wont you please laugh?"

Alice giggled and nodded as Jasper smirked, "You want to take me on little girl?" Bella blushed and nodded, "Honey I love you but I just can't laugh."

Bella nodded and stepped close to him, "You know I think it's your laugh that sounds like you described, warm whiskey, low gravelly and so rare but it will be mine." She stepped back taking a deep breath and already turning red, she began to sing and dance, "I'm a little teapot short and stout, here is my handle here is my spout…" There was silence and then snickers and then laughter. Bella took an embarrassed bow as she finished and they all clapped still chuckling.

"So what's the game Bella?" Emmett asked, ready to keep playing.

"Oh I don't know." Bella blushed. "Alice you're better at this."

"How about Dance, Dance Revolution? I'm ready for some dancing." Rosalie suggested.

"Yeah!" Emmett bounced.

"No way." Bella laughed, "I fall just walking."

"Rock star?" Carlisle suggested.

"Yeah." Emmett agreed.

Rosalie did get up to dance and Alice even got Bella up for a bit as they all sang and took turns playing until Jasper brought out an actual guitar and Edward took place at his piano and it turned into dancing around like idiots for the rest of them, all just laughing and having fun until Bella's phone rang.

She jumped to answer it, out of breath and laughing. "Hello?"

"Bella?"

"Dad… oh its late, I'm so sorry! Alice and I came back early and have been hanging out at the Cullen house and I lost track of time, I'm so sorry!"

"As long as you're alright, I was just starting to get a bit worried."

"No, nothing to worry about, I'm good, great actually, we've just been playing some games."

"Ok, well if you want to spend the night there I'll be working the night shift, I just wanted to check on you before I left."

"I'm really sorry I didn't call dad."

"Ok Bells, just try not to forget next time, have fun and don't be late for school in the morning."

"I wont, I promise."

"Night then."

"Night dad."

"Yay!" Alice clapped, "Slumber party."

"Oh." Bella blushed, "I don't have to sleep over."

"Of course you do." Alice beamed bouncing and grabbing her hand, "come on, Rosalie, Esme, its slumber party time!" She was already rushing up the stairs.

"Um, Alice, what are we doing?"

"Changing into pjs of course and then we'll gossip and paint each others nails and then watch a scary movie with the boys and it's going to be so fun!"

Bella laughed as Alice tugged her into her bedroom with Rosalie and Esme following behind. "I think Rose's pajama's will fit you better than mine." Alice nodded after a minute and before the words were fully out Rosalie was tossing her a tank and cute boxers. Rosalie was wearing an almost identical pair of boxers and tank to the ones she'd given Bella only in another color and Bella was amused to find Esme and Alice in similar ones. Esme patted the ground and held out a nail polish bottle so Bella went to sit with her and let her paint her nails, usually Esme was a mother figure but tonight she seemed more like an older sister and Bella found she liked this version of Esme just as much as the other.

Alice rambled on about school, clothes, the boys and anything else she could think of, asking opinions and questions to Bella about her life before and reviewing trends in decades past. Finally, nails dried, Rosalie declared it was movie time. All the boys were again gathered and waiting, this time in sweats and tees. A movie was already in the machine as they all settled down to watch it. Bella, exhausted from all the fun, fell asleep only fifteen minutes in.

It didn't take long for the dream to overtake her, shifting with dark images and half remembered people. She woke up tired and grateful Esme had coffee, "Didn't sleep well honey?" Esme asked, back to her motherly role.

Bella shrugged, "Over tired maybe, did I talk in my sleep?"

"Not that I heard but Edward carried you to bed as soon as we noticed you were sleeping and we all watched movies until going for a quick hunt at dawn."

"Ok."

"Is everything alright?"

"Fine." Bella smiled at her, "Just tired. I should get ready for school."

"OK dear." Esme smiled at her and nodded.

Alice had picked out an outfit and Bella tugged on the skinny jeans and the ankle boots from the day before with the layered tops Alice had chosen. She thought she looked cute but was as comfortable as in clothes she normally wore and a lot more confident in how she looked.

Edward was waiting to drive her but Bella was surprised when Alice linked their arms and Rosalie led them to her red Audi, "We're driving my car today and the boys are taking Emmett's jeep." Bella just nodded and sent Edward an apologetic smile before getting in.

People stared as much as they had the first day Edward had given her a ride the week before and Bella shifted uncomfortably.

"Relax Bella." Alice sent her a reassuring smile but it was the wave of calm from Jasper that helped her square her shoulders, take Edward's arm and head for the school, making sure to send a quick smile in thanks at Jasper as they reached the spot they went separate ways for class.

Bella ate with them at lunch all week and the days Edward didn't come over after school, Alice did, she was quickly growing closer to all of them, even Rosalie who was still a bit cool to her but wasn't so cold Bella feared frost bite from one look.

She still couldn't shake the dreams though and wasn't getting much rest. It didn't help that Edward had asked her not to come near the house that weekend because Jasper's old coven was visiting and were human blood drinkers. She spent the weekend doing chores and homework and napping but the half remembered dreams haunted her more than ever.

It was the following Friday Alice cornered her after school, "Bella, are you alright?"

"I'm fine Alice." Bella smiled at her friend.

Alice shook her head, "You can talk to me Bella, we're best friends, you're supposed to."

"Really Alice, I'm fine, just a bit tired today is all."

"Jasper says you've been feeling off for weeks and this week he even seems worried. Jasper doesn't worry for nothing." Alice contradicted.

Bella shrugged, "I just, I haven't been sleeping well."

"We could talk to Carlisle, maybe he can give you something."

"No!" Bella half shouted, she wasn't sure why the dreams scared her but something told her she didn't want to remember them, not yet because whatever they were, they would bring change.

"Please talk to me Bella. Or to Edward, he says the few times he's been with you, you toss and turn in your sleep and the things you say make no sense."

"What do I say?" Bella asked her, face ghost white, even next to Alice's pale skin.

Alice shrugged, "I told you, he can't really make sense of it."

Bella reached out and took Alice's hand, "This is going to sound crazy."

"The girl says to her future seeing vampiric best friend?" Alice asks with a lifted eyebrow.

"Right." Bella nods, "Its just, these dreams, I don't remember them, just blurry faces really, and it scares me, something about them scares me but its… alluring too, like something is hiding in my dreams, something important, and I want to know but I'm scared to. I keep trying to hold onto Edward, like really seeing what's in those dreams will take me away from him so I'm sort of on the edges of the dream and I wake up almost as tired as when I went to sleep."

"Bella." Alice's voice was tentative and it made Bella even more nervous, "Dreams are really powerful, more than people realize, my visions, I think they started as dreams, when I was human."

"I don't see the future Alice."

"No, but people see the truth in dreams Bella, it can be confusing and abstract sometimes but dreams are important. Trust me."

"I do."

"Let's talk to Carlisle, whatever is in those dreams, you need rest and as for what's in them, you'll remember when you're ready to face whatever your subconscious is trying to tell you that you already know."

Bella shivered but smiled at her friend, grateful Alice called Charlie and put on a fake happy voice with a pleading tone. At the end of the call Alice had gotten permission to 'kidnap' Bella for the weekend.

Bella packed a bag and let Alice take her to see Carlisle at his office in the hospital. Carlisle left them with a mild sleeping pill and after a hot bath and a promise from Alice she'd be there, Bella laid down to sleep. It was only a little after suppertime but she was so tired and the sleeping pill was quick to work.

_It was a small cabin, furnished in worn, comfortable looking and even a little battered furniture. She loved it, just to her left was a couple but she couldn't quite make out their features. Behind her Alice came bouncing in, laughing, "Bella Whitlock!" Alice hugged her tightly, "It's been forever, you look, well I knew you'd be a gorgeous vampire. Do you forgive me for not coming sooner only he insisted even as controlled as you were it was best not to overwhelm you in your first weeks, really it should be months but you are just so you and I did see you'd be fine if I came."_

_"Oh Alice." She hugged her best friend happy to see her but still in shock about the name and wanted to demand who the hell Whitlock was. Had Edward changed his name? Of course they couldn't always be Cullen or someone might catch on, Bella shrugged it off and flitted back so Alice could greet the other two in the room._

_"Well where is he?" Alice asked looking around._

_Before Bella could ask who a female voice, the woman she couldn't quite see, answered, "Hunting."_

_"Of course" Alice shrugged and turned back to Bella, "Are you alright?"_

_"Yes, of course, I just, it's nothing."_

_"Bella, I'm your best friend, you can always talk to me remember? Its what best friends do." Alice told her taking her hand and leading her to a couch._

_"I think I'm dreaming." Bella told her honestly. "I'm supposed to see something but I don't see anything and I'm confused, have I been dreaming about being changed?"_

_"Maybe." Alice shrugged, "If this is a dream it's got to be telling you something important."_

_"Wait, you believe me? Shouldn't you protest and say you aren't a dream?"_

_"Dreams reveal things to us Bella, things we already know but maybe wont acknowledge or aren't ready to face." Alice told her with a sly smile, "If this is a dream what is it revealing?"_

_"I'm going to be a vampire?" Bella frowned, "A controlled newborn."_

_"What else? Why are you dreaming about me, sitting here, talking with you?"_

_Bella frowned, "Because you told me to."_

_"I told you to think about me?"_

_"You said I needed to rest and that you'd stay with me when I took the sleeping pill."_

_"Ok, so here I am, in your subconscious, put here because you wanted me here so you didn't face the dream alone, what's the dream about Bella?"_

_"Being a newborn?" Bella asked her but Alice remained unreadable. She turned to look at the two strangers she couldn't quite see, "Is it about them? Do I meet them? Are they dangerous?"_

_"Do you feel threatened?" Dream Alice asked her with a tilt to her head and a smile tugging her lips._

_"No." Bella shook her head, "I feel safe but sad and well, a little scared of whatever this dream means, what is it hiding from me."_

_"The question is, what are you hiding from yourself that the dream is trying to make you see? Is it becoming a vampire?"_

_Bella shook her head; "I want to be part of your family, forever."_

_"So here you sit, a controlled new born, what about this life aren't you facing? What do you need to see here Bella?"_

_Bella looked down at her hands, softly sparkling in the fading sunlit room, "The Cullen's aren't here, maybe I'm afraid they wont be, that you all wont love me when I wake up and I'll be alone."_

_"You aren't alone." She reminded me, nodding to the strange couple still wrapped in shadows._

_"Who are they?"_

_Alice shrugged, "I'm your imagination Bella, I know what you know, no more and no less, you tell me who they are."_

_"You do know them though, you were just talking to them!"_

_"Maybe your subconscious knows I'd know them because you'll always be my best friend and so I'll know the people important to you." She suggested and then shrugged, "I do seem to know them well." She nodded to the shadows with a slight frown, that must mean you know them too, so who are they Bella? Can you think of anyone in your life they might be?"_

_"Of course not, you're the only vampires I know."_

_"People from a photo or a painting in our house that maybe drew you?"_

_"I don't know." Bella frowned, "It's so confusing." She hesitated, "Maybe… a photo maybe… I don't know." Bella sighed and shook her head, she almost remembered a photo catching her attention when Edward showed her around but she'd wanted to examine them all closer, to see the family through the decades, but Edward had caught her attention and moved them along to see the paintings in Carlisle's office._

_"You don't sit here and talk with me in the dream Bella, so let yourself dream, then you'll see whatever you're trying to tell yourself." Alice took her hand and squeezed it, "I'll be here with you as long as you want me to be."_

_Bella reach over and hugged her gratefully, "You feel the same as me now." She whispered._

_"That's because in your dream, we are the same Bella." Alice giggled pulling back, "So what now? You had me come for a visit, what shall we do in this dream of yours?"_

_Bella frowned as she looked over at the shadowy people, "Hello?" _

_"Bella?" The woman's voice was warm and caring, "How are you feeling, should we hunt?" "I'm bettin we head into the city and he'll find us quick."_

_Bella felt a chill down her spine but wasn't sure if it was fear or excitement, maybe a bit of both. "Feel like playing sugar?" The woman asked, a laugh in her voice._

_Bella nodded, "You don't think I'll hurt anyone do you?"_

_"Of course not." The man laughed, "Control better 'n that there Pixie I'd wager." _

_Bella let them lead her outside but the woodsy scene from the windows had become city streets and they were walking into a bar, all four of them dressed up, Alice and her in the outfits from a few weeks before and the two strangers whose faces she still couldn't see, were dressed similarly. It was a karaoke bar and they seemed to be having a good time when apprehension filled her and she turned to see another blurry figure, "Havin fun kitten?" He purred into her ear. He smelled like crisp autumn apples, new leather and honey. His familiar voice tingled at her mind as she shivered again, a feeling of joy and lust filling her but some sadness and betrayal as well, no not betrayal, guilt, she felt guilt at his voice and her knees trembled. She knew that voice, she didn't know from where, it was low and sexy but it wasn't Edward's voice._

_She tried to step back and focus on his face to remember where she'd heard that voice, "Where are the Cullen's?"_

_"There darlin." He whispered turning her and they were in the Cullen living room, the two shadowy figures to the side, joined by others and then the Cullen's, all of them standing in a circle, beckoning Bella to join them to play the game. She turned but the man wasn't behind her anymore and she looked back to the perfect Cullen's._

Bella gasped as she sat up in bed, early morning light just beginning to chase the dark out of the room.

"Bella?" Alice asked, "Are you alright?"

"The Cullen's." Bella told her meeting her eyes, "I'm dreaming about all of you and becoming a vampire and there are others, three seem important but I can't see who they are and I only almost recognize the voice of one of them and a name, you call me a name when you first see me and I think that maybe the Cullen's have moved and are using a new name only I've never heard it before."

"What's the name Bella?" Alice asks gently taking her hand.

"Whitlock. You call me Bella Whitlock." Alice nods, hiding the flicker of surprise so fast Bella doesn't catch even a small trace.

Alice pulls her into a hug and searches out a vision of the Whitlocks, nothing overly important comes to her, not yet but she's sure it will. This dream of Bella's it means something and Alice is afraid she knows what that is.

"Don't tell the others ok." Alice whispers as they pull apart, "Just let me figure a few things out first?"

"Ok." Bella agrees tentatively.

Alice took her shopping and Bella almost fainted when she saw Rosalie behind the wheel, she was used to the blonde joining them at the Cullen house but besides lunch at school, those were the only times she saw the beautiful vampire.

They had a good time as they picked out a few things and tried them on but even Alice seemed a bit distracted so they didn't stay as long as Alice usually preferred and instead went back to the Cullen house to do manicures and pedicures with Esme.

Bella was expected with Charlie at Billy's that night so she hugged everyone goodbye and the next day she did homework and chores. Alice hadn't mentioned the dream and though the petite girl seemed distracted, the week seemed to pass normally and that Friday Edward invited her to play baseball with the family, do to the coming storm. She didn't understand until the game began why they'd needed the storm.

"Is everything alright Edward?" She asked as he grabbed a bat for his turn.

"Of course." He smiled at her but she didn't quite believe him.

It was only a few more rounds and Alice was yelling for the game to stop.


	2. Chapter 2

Bella fought back tears as Edward helped her into the back of Carlisle's Mercedes, "You're one of us now Bella, we love you and we will protect you."

"I can't, if any of you, please be careful."

"We will and Jasper will keep you safe." Edward sent her a grim smile before closing the door.

"Edward?" Bella asked after him, confused.

"Be safe." He told her stepping away and towards his family as Jasper and Alice got in the car with her.

"Rest Bella." Alice told her, "It will all be ok, I promise."

With Jasper's influence and the numb feeling the fear had left her with Bella did find herself drifting off and behind her eyelids she could see the shadowy figures, one seemed to hold all the comfort and she wanted to run to him but he seemed to stay the same distance no matter how fast she tried to go.

_"Who are you?" She finally called out to him._

_"You know." He told her. "Fear blinds us both but you know."_

_"Wait!" She called after him, "Don't leave me, please, don't leave me."_

_"I hate to be alone." She heard Alice tell her and she spun around looking for her best friend._

_"Alice! No, don't leave me, stay, we don't have to be alone. Alice!"_

Bella woke with a start and Alice handed her water, "I'm ok Bella, the family will all be ok, trust that."

Bella gave her a weak smile and nodded, "Just don't leave me ok?"

"We're family Bella, none of us will ever have to be alone again."

Waves of comfort from Jasper had her drifting off into another nap, the ghosts of her dreams there to keep her company. She drifted like that until they stopped at a hotel. A suite was booked and Bella was led upstairs and Alice ran her a bath.

"I need to call Peter."

"Peter?" Bella frowned at her, "Jasper's brother from before the Cullen's right? The one Edward kissed?"

Alice giggled and nodded her head but Jasper knocked on the door and Bella thought by his words he was as surprised as she was, "Ali? You want to call Pete?"

"Yes. I need to ask him something, you stay here with Bella." Alice turned to smile at her, "And you just relax in that tub and then try to get some rest."

Alice disappeared out the bathroom and took Jasper's phone, "Just trust me, please." She told him, kissing his jaw and leaving the room.

Peter picked up on the second ring, "Well ain't this a damn surprise."

"Peter." Alice sighed, "I take it you knew I was going to call."

"Been expecting it for a couple days but no idea as to why, everything ok over that way?"

"No, I mean its fine, I think. It could be great except this stupid tracker and my stupid limitations. I mean, they were leaving and the storm and it was perfect to play and then they heard and their stupid snap decision, people should not be allowed to make snap decisions!"

"Whoa there Pixie, take it back a notch you may have lost me."

"Right." Alice sighed, "You know about Bella."

"Edward's Bella, the human we ain't allowed to be within smellin distance of despite our control likely bein better 'an any of yours what with not starvin ourselves and all."

"Not really the time to argue about the diet I introduced Jasper too Peter."

"So what's up?"

"Do you have any, feelings, about Jasper? I mean do you _know_ anything about him?"

"Not more'n usual, as in, he's still suckin bunnies and playin house with you and cagin the demon he ought to makin nice with."

"Peter, please." Alice wasn't sure whether to laugh, cry or yell at him.

"What's goin on sugar?" Charlotte's voice filtered over the phone.

"I think, well the visions not clear, I mean it is, I see Bella as part of our family, as a vampire and as my best friend but I thought, well we all thought she was a good companion for Edward and maybe she's his mate, you know its pretty rare but so are singers and what if singers are mates when they're humans? We don't really know, I've never met a human mate before only we don't think they're mates and now I'm thinking that they are and he's just to, I don't know what, to see it and she does but because of him and us and everything she wont."

"Lost me again Pixie." Peter interrupted her ranting.

"I think Bella is Jasper's mate." Alice blurted out.

"What?" Charlotte hissed.

"Whoa." Peter breathed at the same time.

"I know we aren't the best of friends but I like you both and I respect you, I even love you because of Jasper and you know, you know I only ever wanted him to be happy, to have a good future and I wanted to be sure but I'm running out of time because this stupid tracker has fixated on Bella and I see it going bad Peter, I see it going very bad and I'm scared and worried and I don't know what to do here because what if I'm wrong? Then I've wrecked things between her and Edward and they really would make good companions and I've hurt Jasper and ruined what we have and I know that sounds selfish but I love him. I don't know what to do here and you're the one who knows shit so please, just please tell me you have some feeling about Jasper, that you know _something_."

"I know me an Char are headin your way, you just keep that little human safe and we'll take care of the tracker together. If she is the Major's mate, chances are he'll recognize her if he's ever let out of that damn cage long enough to smack Jasper upside the head with it, hell fucker is probably rattling the cage tryin to force that stubborn ass to see what I bet he's to fuckin busy hatin himself to see."

"Jasper doesn't hate himself Peter."

"No he only hates part of himself because you believe me Pixie that demon is part of him and its past time he embraced it and found his own balance and not the thing Maria created or the pansy you did but the fuckin Major."

"I only ever wanted him to be happy." She whispered.

"We know sugar." Charlotte told her gently, "It's just time he let go of the things he used to be and accept who he is, demon and man."

"Do you think she could be his mate?"

"I don't reckon you'd have called us if you weren't pretty damn sure yourself." Peter snorted.

"We hope so." Charlotte added, "Hopefully Peter will know something when we meet her, until then, keep a close eye on her and we'll be there real soon to help."

Alice hung up the phone and went back to the hotel room, Jasper's whispering voice filtered to her from under the bedroom door, "You're worth it."

A moment later and he'd joined her, "She's resting now and starting to feel a bit numb, of course I'm dosing her with enough calm I'm surprised she ain't already passed out."

"I can feel it." Alice added, relaxing back into the sofa.

"Pete have anything to say?"

"They're on their way here."

"Edward won't much like that."

"He'll understand." Alice contradicted, she'd told him what she suspected back when Bella had revealed the name Whitlock in her dream, she knew he was trying to rein in how he felt about Bella but he still loved her.

Jasper just nodded and pulled her into his arms, "Talk to me darlin." Alice shook her head and hugged him, "Since when ain't you been able to tell me?"

"I have to be sure Jas, to many futures depend on it. Yours, mine, hers, everyones."

Jasper frowned at her the gold in his eyes growing dark, Alice watched as he backed into a chair and sank into it, "She's my mate then?"Alice gasped and stared at him mouth agape, unsure what to say. Jasper chuckled darkly and shook his head, "Fucking demons been rattling the cage lately and that moment, in the field, I almost lost control, almost took the three fuckers out where they stood."

"Why didn't you?" Alice asked softly, regaining her composure.

Jasper shook his head, "Let loose the uncontrolled starving demon from hell on three strange nomads with a human who may or may not be the perfect match to my soul within harming distance?" He asked her with a quirked brow. "All because the tracker was emanating waves of desire and the blood lust we all always feel? I can't read minds Ali, I had no idea what he was thinking until Edward flipped his lid. I had a bad feeling but the fucking demon is a bit possessive and angry about any trace of lust in Edward, I let him out he's like to rip our brothers head off first because you can be sure no one wants her blood the way he does. Then what Ali? I turn on the only true food source in the field?"

"You wouldn't have hurt her." Alice frowned at him.

"I would if she weren't really my mate and even if she were, I could have hurt one of the family, or you."

"No." Alice shook her head in denial.

"Ali, last time that side of me came out I couldn't see, there was no me at all, just rage."

"That's not true."

"It is." He sighed again and ran his hand through his hair, "I began to lock away parts of him when I met Peter, just letting myself feel friendship locked part of the demon up."

Alice shook his head in protest, "Letting yourself feel your own emotions wasn't locking part of you up Jasper, it was setting part of you free."

"You don't know that darlin. If I let him out, if I shut off the humanity in me, I might just slaughter the girl in there, other half of my soul or not and you too because I wont recognize you, won't feel anything."

"Letting him out doesn't mean you have to shut off Jazz." Alice argued.

"Ali." Jasper protested.

"No." She hissed, "Peter and Charlotte are right," She shook her head, "Fuck."

"Alice?"

"You hate part of yourself Jasper and it's not right, you are so good and beautiful and strong and don't look at me like that because I know everything there is to know about you Jasper Whitlock, including every dark and deadly detail of your years with Maria and I'm telling you, I _know_ you, inside and out, body, mind, heart and soul and I love you, deadly dark side and all because no matter how the violence in that side of you scares me, _you_ will never scare me. So let him out, slaughter that damn tracker because you will not ever and I mean ever hurt me or our family and that includes Bella, mate or not."

"Say you're right, say I let that side of me see light again darlin, do you think for a second I'd be able to stop that demon from taking her? Changing her?"

"She's going to be one of us Jasper, I've seen it and she wants to be, she wants to be part of the family."

"She doesn't understand what being part of this family means Alice, what she'd have to give up. She's still a child."

"Women had children at her age when you were alive."

"When I was alive we rode horses, muskets had one shot, a gentleman was never alone with a lady and life expectancy was under 45."

"She's not a child is all I'm saying."

"She is Alice. I like her, you know I think she's smart and funny and vey mature compared to any high school girl we've ever come across but she is still just a junior in high school. She has a lot of living left to do, a lot of growing up and mate or not the last thing I'd ever want to do is steal her life away."

"Maybe it's not stealing her life away, not if its what she wants!"

"She doesn't know what she wants Ali. Not really."

"How can you say that?"

"Because it's true, because we don't know if it's what she wants or just what she accepts because we've told her what we are and that you've seen her one of us. She's twisted up in love for Edward, for our family and not thinking clearly, not thinking about the future about everything she'd be sacrificing and everything this life means, an eternity of never ending days, little to no change year after year, decade after decade with blood lust pervading all, burning and consuming and making even the purest souls, the best of us turn into demons. She's seen the world of vampires through the Cullen mask of perfection but never the dark sides of us, Edward wont even let her see the downsides, the flaws in this family let alone the reality of our world Alice and I don't just mean the hell I was brought into because that is as small a piece of our world as the Cullen's idyllic image."

"So what Jasper? You watch her become Edward's companion? You and I pretend nothing's different between us? We sit back and watch her live her life until you decide she's reached some arbitrary age of adulthood and then give her the choice? Or you take it from her entirely and force us to leave her? Should we abandon her? Let the world decide her fate like it did ours, like it did for Rosalie?"

"Alice."

"No." Alice hissed, "Life is hard and it's cruel and I will not ever, _ever,_ leave her to suffer it alone. Not the least reason being she is your mate Jasper! Do you know how long I've wanted this for you? I might have wished it were me but it's not and after almost fifty years together Jasper I finally, finally get to see you have what you deserve."

"It's not that simple Ali."

"It can be!"

Jasper shook his head and they sat glaring at each other a while, until sounds of Bella moving around broke the silence. "Does she have any idea?"

"She's been dreaming about you, about Peter and Charlotte. It's why she wasn't sleeping well. She couldn't make out much in the dreams, no faces but she gave me the name Whitlock and I've been trying to figure out if she's your mate since."

"That what's been wrong with Ed?"

"Yes." Alice nodded, "I told him right away, I didn't want him to be hurt more than he already would be, if it was true."

"We still don't know that it is."

"Don't we?"

"No, so you aren't going to say anything to her either."

"Jasper."

"Alice, please." His eyes, still dark, were pleading. "Let me deal with this, let me figure out if it's real and what the best thing to do is."

"So she doesn't get a say?"

"Of course she does, if it's real."

The door to the bedroom creaked open and Bella's head appeared, "Is everything alright?"

"Yes." Alice forced a smile, "Edward's going to call to check in soon."

"Everyone is ok though?"

"Everyone is fine."

"Did you talk to Peter?"

"Oh," Alice's smile eased into a more natural one, "Yes, he and Charlotte are on the way." Her eyes went a little unfocused, "They'll be here very soon."

An hour later they were staring at the drawing Alice had just finished from the place in her vision and Bella said she was sure it was her old ballet studio when Peter walked in.

"That is our queue to leave Arizona." He shot a toothy grin at Bella, "Peter Wh."

"Jasper's brother and his mate Charlotte!" Alice interrupted sharply, jumping to her feet "and if he says its time to go then it's time to go. Now. Right now. Bella let's go get your things!"

"Alice?" Bella frowned at her best friend in question.

"Let me help." Charlotte smiled, helping Alice usher Bella into the bedroom and pack up the few things taken out.

"Don't answer the phone!" Peter called after them.

"Why?" Bella shot a confused look at Alice and Charlotte.

"No clue, just don't do it." Charlotte said plucking Bella's phone from the bed and crushing it in her hand. "Peter probably doesn't know why either."

Alice shrugged and turned to Bella's confused face, she wasn't sure whether to be angry or worried or laugh at the metal and plastic pieces littering the floor that moments ago had been her cell. "Trust me Bella?"

That caught her attention and Bella turned to Alice with a weak smile, "Of course."

"Peter knows things, things less detailed than me but more accurate because they don't change with a decision, they are things that just are so if he says no phones and its time to go."

"Then no phones and its time to go." Bella nodded feeling a bit overwhelmed but oddly numb too.

They went out to the living room and Bella shot Jasper a grateful smile for the calm still pervading her every emotion, "So where to?"

He sent a small wave of amusement and a more natural smile softened her face a moment but it was gone in an instant as he nodded and opened the door, "How do you feel about a road trip?"

"Where?"

"No where anyone will think to look for any of us."

"Ok." Bella sent him a smile and followed Alice out of the room but stopped in the hall, "What about my parents?" She'd asked Edward the same thing but he'd shrugged her concern off, she hoped they wouldn't.

"I have a tracker friend of my own gone to keep an eye on your mother and Alice will have to get some of the Cullen's head back to Forks to keep an eye on your father and keep up some appearance since you've disappeared."

"I told my father I was coming here, to my mother."

Peter just shook his head, "Instead you've gone missing."

Bella wanted to protest but the elevator arrived and as they stepped on she saw Alice had disappeared into a vision.

When her eyes came back into focus she gave Bella a look filled with regret, "He's right, you need to go missing. It's the best way to keep people safe."

Jasper hit the button for the main floor angrily, it smashed but luckily still went down, "Jasper?"

"He takes issue with your life bein highjacked is all." Peter explained tugging Charlotte into his side.

Bella nodded and then frowned at him, "Where are you from?"

"Texas, born 1852, changed 1874 by yours truly over there, left the cursed state 1938 with my lovely Charlotte, turned 1937, who was born in New Mexico 1919. We went back in 1939 for three months to retrieve the fucker and mostly avoided the state since so if the fucker tracking you knows who you're with, he's A, dumber than fuck and B, going to assume none of us will step foot in the damn state with a little human in tow, which is why that is exactly where we are going to take this little adventure."

Jasper quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Well hell." Charlotte snorted.

"Yup, it's time for that family reunion I told ya we'd be havin again soon."

"Family reunion?" Bella questioned looking from one unhappy face to another.

"We're off to meet our maker." Charlotte huffed.

"I thought Jasper made Peter?"

"He did." Peter grinned, "Charlotte too, this bitch is grandma."

"Sorry."

"My maker." Jasper supplied, "Maria."

Bella frowned looking from one grim face to another, "Is anyone going to tell me about her?"

"In the car." Charlotte nodded.

Bella sat in the back of the SUV between Charlotte and Alice, one hand held by each vampire as Jasper told his story, when he reached the part where he changed Peter they filled in the blanks or overlapped bits from each of their lives and then came Charlotte and them all leaving and Jasper's struggles and then Jasper took over again from parting from his coven up to meeting Alice and then the Cullen's, Peter and Charlotte filled in their part of those years with much less detail, they were just nomads who kept in touch with Jasper. Until Maria tracked the four of them down and they all met in New Orleans to make nice, well to ensure a truce. With the end of the new born armies and the fights for territories Maria wanted to make sure she was safe from them and promised they were safe from her. Maria now lived in a large estate in Texas her focus moved from power and territory to sex, shopping and blood. They'd seen each other a half dozen times or so over the last few decades.

The telling took a long time, hours of driving but Bella was enraptured by the story. She felt so many emotions over the course of that day and night she was overloaded and finally gave in to exhaustion as Charlotte was telling her about the last time they'd met up with Maria.

_She was wrapped in his arms and wanted to pull away and look up at his face, instead she traced a scar over his arm and focused on the woman across from them, Alice._

_Bella smiled at Alice, but her heart felt tight with sadness and longing. "You'll be back?"_

_"I'll always be back Bella. We're sisters. You Whitlocks are stuck with me."_

_"I love you Ali."_

_"I love you too Bella." She grinned and nodded to the man holding Bella, "Have a good honeymoon."_

_The man pulled her tighter against his lean frame and Bella bit back a moan making Alice laugh._

_She pulled away when Alice disappeared and turned but he was gone. In the distance she saw four shadows. "Alice?" She called._

_"She's alone. We're all alone." A soft feminine voice whispered. Not Alice. Who? _

_"Who are you?" She called, "Please don't leave me."_

_"Bella?" _

_She spun and saw Edward, his hand held out to her, "Come with me love, it's not safe."_

_She looked back at the shadows, a woman's chuckle made her shiver, "We're none of us safe alone."_

_"Bella, please, don't you love me?" _

_She spun around to Edward, "Of course I love you." She reached out to him but he was shaking his head at her and backing away._

_"How could you do it Bella?"_

_"Edward?"_

_"Where's Alice Bella?" He demanded._

_"Alice?" Bella looked around, "Alice?" She called._

_"Stay with me Bella. I'll keep you safe. They're dangerous."_

_"Turn me and I can help." She begged._

_"So you can hurt Alice?" He shook his head, "So you can leave me?"_

_"No," She shook her head, "I love you."_

_"Then come with me and leave them."_

_"Alone." The woman's voice whispered._

_"Alice? You don't have to be alone."_

_"I'll never be alone Bella. We're best friends. Sisters." Alice was back smiling at her but it became a frown, "They need you though Bella." The man was behind her again, his arm wrapped protectively around her and she leaned back. She didn't have to be afraid, not in his arms. _

_She traced the scar and shook her head, "It's ok Alice. I'll make it ok."_

_"Bella?"_

_"Edward?" She frowned at him._

_"Please." He begged her, __"__I need you Bella. I love you. Please don't hurt me like this." He waved at the shadows. "They don't deserve you, they'll only hurt you, ruin you but I love you. Don't you love me?"_

_"Edward." She moved to step forward but hesitated as the arm around her loosened and the chest bracketing hers pulled back. She grabbed at his __forearm a nail digging into the scar she'd been tracing afraid to let him go but knowing she should reach out and take the hand Edward held out. She loved him. Irrevocably. She just had to let go of this arm, let go of the shadows warm, comforting embrace. She just wasn't sure she could, wasn't sure she wanted to. Not even for Edward. She knew it was wrong but she belonged here, her heart knew it, was screaming it and so she stood and watched Edward's heart breaking. "I'm sorry." She sobbed._

Bella woke from the dream with a start and found herself alone in a strange room. Was she still dreaming?

"Hello?"

"Hello." A woman, almost as beautiful as Rosalie, smirked at her.

"Who… who are you?"

"Maria." The woman answered with a grin.

"Jasper's Maria?"

Her grin widened even as she snorted, "I could only ever dream." At Bella's confused look she chuckled, "His maker, Maria, yes."

Bella glanced around, "Where's Alice?"

"Alice is checking in with her coven. Jasper, despite lingering ill will, trusts that I'm not insane enough to harm you and has left me with the task of watching over you while he takes care of the messy business with the tracker while Charlotte and Peter make sure he's not overcome with all that pent up rage, repressed instinct and self hatred." Maria frowned at bit and gave a deprecating smile, "Mostly my fault of course but" She shrugged, "What's past is past, make love not war, speaking of my to little to late redemption, shall we get you cleaned up? A bath I'm sure will be lovely."

Bella let the vampire lead her through to a bathroom bigger than her bedroom at home and a tub filled with fragrant water big enough to fit ten. Trying not to judge the woman, and hate her, for the history she knew this woman had inflicted on Jasper but trying to remember the few good things the he and his coven had mentioned and the fact that they were trying to move on from all that hate and while not friends with each other, nor did their seem to be forgiveness, they did seem to have or rather be trying to move forward from the past.

"Will you tell me your story?" She asked as Maria fiddled with a speaker and very soft music began to filter into the room.

"Haven't they already?" She seemed genuinely surprised.

"They told me their stories, not yours."

Maria seemed to pause a moment, darkness flitting across her eyes, "Yes." She finally answered softly, motioning her to the hot bath, "Is the water to hot?"

Bella stuck a toe in, "A bit but I like it hot."

Maria nodded and began to remove her dress, Bella blushed and looked away, Maria chuckled, "Hurry up and get undressed and get in the water, I wont look if it makes you uncomfortable."

Still blushing Bella undressed and looked over, Maria had sunk into the water and was sitting with her back to Bella. Hurrying she slipped a foot into the hot water and then pulled it out.

"Too hot?" Maria inquired again.

"Just give me a minute to adjust and it will be perfect." Bella assured her, taking her time to get in like it was a hot tub instead of a bath, a very fragrant oiled hot tub.

"This story isn't easy for me." Maria told her after they'd both settled in the tub in silence a while.

"You don't have to…"

"It isn't easy Bella but I don't think I've told it to anyone before, I don't think anyone has cared enough about what used to be to ask. Reasons aren't excuses and with the things I've done, no one cares to hear an excuse and those who suffer don't believe any reason valid for their pain." Bella licked her lips and nodded. "I was born in Mexico, when she was still New Spain and I was turned, at the age of 19, by a woman who became a mother to me. The southern vampire wars had only just begun then and my parents were escaping Benito's rampage. When my mother saw me, I reminded her of her baby sister from when she was human, centuries before and so she changed me. I spent the first years of this life with her and her mate, my father and then we moved into Monterey and I found my mate and turned him. The Volturi had killed Benito and left by that time but it was a dangerous time, war was everywhere so we built our own army and we fought to survive. We were smarter than Benito, none of the covens did anything big enough to draw the Volturi to us but it was a violent life, nothing but blood and war and the fight for territory. The only ones we could trust were each other and I was very happy. I was in love, my mate was strong, my coven had good territory and though it was a violent life my mother had brought me into, I was happier than I'd ever been as a human, we had love and family." Maria paused, pan filling her expression, "We weren't strong enough. Or maybe we just weren't vicious enough, not driven enough. We had the terrirtory we wanted. We didn't see the need to take more." Her hand clenched on a flower floating on the surface of the steaming water.

"Maria?"

"Other covens came, they wanted expansion, they wanted Monterey and Mexico, they wanted what we had and so they took it."

"Your mate?"

"My mate, my parents, anyone we'd befriended. I was the only one to survive and only because Rico forced me to run. My mother and I both. We ran but she didn't make it. I don't know why they left me alive."

"I'm so sorry." Bella moved through the water to take the vampires hand and Maria turned black eyes on her, pain etched in every feature.

"You shouldn't be. What they created that day? She was a monster. I have no doubt that my _children_ edited much for you little human but I promise you, I was a heartless cruel and evil bitch, Satan's Mistress. I craved power and blood and death, I wanted everyone to pay and I trusted no one. The first hint the two women I built my army with would turn against me and I killed them both. I wanted the power to myself anyways. I was more than a monster, I took the lives of people, men, women, children and vampires without thought or care. I wanted my trackers to go after Peter and Charlotte, to punish them for abandoning me. If they wanted to be together I'd let them be, in death." Bella licked her lips and nodded while Maria lifted her eyes, "Then Jasper left me."

"Is that why you changed?"

Maria laughed and shook her head, "I was very angry with him but while I admit for all that time, more than a century, I had lost my mind but I wasn't quite insane enough to seek out my permanent death. Maybe, if it were right after Rico, but that pain had turned to rage rather than depression."

"What do you mean?"

Maria turned to her a disbelieving frown marring her beautiful brow, "Jasper is the most dangerous vampire in existence." She snorted, "I toed the line of Benito's insanity all the time he was with me, which was the bulk of my century long reign. The only reason the Volturi didn't intervene is because of the control Jasper kept of my army." She snorted, "He doesn't need an army of new borns, Jasper, when he lets lose the darkness, the demon in him, he's the most deadly being to ever walk this earth. He's the level of power to walk into Volterra and stage a one man revolution, had he only the ambition to be a King." Maria's gaze drifted off as her thoughts carried her away, "Going after him, would have been my death." Her voice seemed far away but then she seemed to shake herself and turn her attention back to Bella with a smile, "Jasper has no desire to rule the vampire world though and few know his true power." She shrugged, "Most of which is locked carefully away and weakened with the blood of bunnies or what have you." She waved her hand in dismissal of the thought.

"So what changed for you?"

"The end of my control of Jasper, ended my reign as the most powerful in the wars. Luckily I still had my mind, debatable insanity or not, I am manipulate and brilliant, so I got myself out of the mess by bringing the Volturi out to end the southern wars. I was still known as a ruthless and powerful bitch and built a new life for myself."

Bella frowned as she watched her a long moment before shaking her head, "There's more."

Maria gave her an indulgent smile, she seemed both pleased and annoyed with the statement, but admitted, "Yes." Maria sighed and ran her hand over the top of the water swirling the coils of oil and bits of flower in random patterns. "I realized I was alone." Maria gave her a sad sort of smile. "I had my rage for company and when it waned I had Jasper but he'd left me and so had my rage. Depression finally settled over me, not enough to seek death but a pervading melancholy, bordom with life." She gave a smile and small snort, "No, boredom with death." She met Bella's eyes, "I was tired of death, of power I could never enjoy for trying to hold onto it. So I decided to live. To see what the world had to offer outside of war and blood."

"Are you happy?"

"Sometimes." Maria admitted, sadness haunting the depths of her eyes, "When I grew brave enough, when years of trying to live gave me new hope, I contacted Jasper. At this point I realized I'd loved him, I'd loved them both my Major and my Captain. I sought, not understanding or even forgiveness but to at least to at least smooth over the hate. Both have accepted this version of me and allow me to know them, I've been given the chance to know Charlotte and I'm grateful they saved her from me, seeing them together, it reminds me of Rico and I, so long ago. I hope for that for Jasper one day and until then, I'm grateful he has Alice even if I wish I could be her for him, that I could have been the one to heal him instead of the one to break him."

"I'm sorry Maria."

"For what?" She looked honestly surprised and confused as she turned her full attention back on the human.

"Your suffering." Bella shook her head, tears stinging her eyes, "I'm very sorry for all your suffered."

Maria smirked, it was a self-deprecating look as she reminded the girl, "I made many suffer, for a very long time, I made many suffer much worse fates."

"Maybe." Bella agreed, "It doesn't change the fact that I'm sorry for what you suffered. I'm sorry you lost Rico."

Maria watched her for a moment before giving a slow nod, "Thank you Bella." They shared a moment of peaceful quiet before Alice enetered.

"Feeling better Bella?"

"Did Jasper go to kill James?"

Alice licked her lips and nodded, "Yes."

"Of course." Maria added with a chuckle.

"Maria." Alice's voice was a warning but Maria held her hands up as though in supplication.

"The water is still hot Pixie Seer, come and join us and relax. My boys will be back with food for the little human soon enough and I've little female company to share time with."

Alice snorted and stripped off her clothes joinging them in the water and sighing at the heat before frowning at Bella, "No wonder you're so flushed, Maria's skin should be cooling the water, but it must have been scalding when you stepped in."

"No." Bella shook her head and then grinned, "Maybe but it feels wonderful."

Maria chuckled handed over a bottle of shampoo. "Have you seen any of the summer lines yet Alice? I'm thinking of what I should get for my trip to Volterra this summer."

The two vampires talked clothes and shoes while Bella finished her bath, rinsing her hair from the shower head to the side. When she got out she was wrapped in a soft robe and Maria gave her clothing.

Bella frowned at it and looked back to Maria, "Thanks?" She offered hesitantly looking at the very expensive looking formal dress.

Maria chuckled, "Women always wore dresses in my day, I'm afraid I haven't changed much over the years and I like to feel beautiful besides, company is an occasion to dress up, its so rare for me."

"It'll be fun." Alice grinned at her. "Indulge her. I always do." Alice laughed and held up a gown to her frame twirling with it before shaking her head, "Not this one though."

"These are for Bella to choose from." Maria told her. "I have the perfect one for you."

"Oh!" Alice gasped and clapped, "It is perfect!" She laughed and followed Maria out of the room, "We'll be right back Bella!"

The dress Bella chose was a corseted top dress in black, with a sweetheart sequin top that was sheer at the waist so her skin tone peeked through. When Alice returned in a silvery beaded sweetheart top dress with a float-y tulle shirt that was high in the front and low in the back.

tight fitting strapless gown in vibrant pink with a sweetheart top and a side slit and Maria, also in a strapless dress with a sweetheart top was wearing a champaign colored lace dress, the nude slip under it making it seem almost see-through as it hugged her curves and then floated out like a trumpet just past her hips. Both women were also barefoot making Bella grin.

Hair was done, and though Maria pinned her long locks up and did deep red lips to match her vibrant red eyes but went without eye-shadow or liner. Bella's was left loose around her shoulders and given a natural wavy almost windblown or messy look. They rimmed her eyes in black kohl and left the rest of her without makeup. Alice curled her hair in a twenties style and did a smoky silver gray eye.

Maria changed the music and led them through the house where Bella finally saw some of the beautiful woman's harem. Trays of food had been set up and Bella found herself having fun and forgetting the world for a few hours. Until Charlotte showed up, a completely flabbergasted expression on her face as she took in the two vampires and teenage human in their dresses, dancing around the room together. Reality crashed back to Bella. "My parents?" She breathed.

"Safe." Charlotte assured her immediately with a compassionate smile.

"The tracker?" Maria asked with a slightly dark looking smile.

Charlotte frowned at her and Bella sighed, "Jasper killed him?"

"Yes." Charlotte confirmed, her voice defensive.

"What about the other two?"

"They won't be a problem."

"Charlotte?"

"Jasper killed the woman too." Alice spoke up "Laurent isn't going to be an issue, I saw him with Irina after he decided to seek out the Denali's."

"So its over?" Bella wasn't sure why she felt almost sad at the idea. Of course she was glad her family was safe, her parents and the Cullen's both. The last few days hadn't been easy though the last few hours had been fun.

"Yes." Charlotte agreed.

"Where are Peter and Jasper?"

"Peter's with Jasper. They'll be back for us soon."

"Should we start home without them?"

Three sets of eyes stared at Bella in surprise and sorrow, "No Bella." Charlotte told her gently, "You can't go home."

"You have a new home." Maria informed her.

"Here?!" Bella's voice was high in shock, she'd had fun, for a couple hours but staying there? Leaving her whole life, her parents behind?

Maria chuckled and shook her head, "Oh you're welcome to of course." She smiled at Bella, "I think I'd enjoy knowing the vampire you and having a sister again but" Maria shrugged, "The decision isn't mine. I don't believe I even get an opinion."

Bella looked from her to Alice and Charlotte and back until settling on Alice, "Ali?"

Alice shook her head a sighed, venom in her eyes, "We can take you back Bella. I can take you back and we can say we ran away together, we can give you back your life."

"Alice?" Something felt very, very wrong with that, with everything.

"That's not a real option." Charlotte glared at Alice.

"It is." Alice told her, "Jasper will insist on it."

"Jasper will insist on me going home?" Bella clarified, "But you don't want me to?"

"Jasper will insist on giving you the choice."

Maria snorted, "The Major wouldn't and I'm guessing that's why he's not here himself yet?" It was part statement and part question to Charlotte who just shrugged.

"Charlotte?" Bella turned to her needing someone to explain.

"I don't question the Major darlin." Her eyes were soft and warm completely opposite to her tone "He told me to come back and check on you, so I'm here."

"She means Jasper and Peter only trust me so much and she doesn't in the least." Maria corrected.

"You tortured my mate and maker for almost a century, when I was turned accidentally you kept me to fight for the year you deemed me semi-useful before ordering me killed."

Maria shrugged, "Yet here you stand, a happily mated vampire instead of a dead girl rotting out in some Texan field of corpses tossed aside after feeding."

"I'd have been neither if your army hadn't decimated my town!"

"You'd have never met Peter if my army hadn't passed through that town."

"I hate you."

"Be that as it may Charlotte, never forget, I made you, or at least I made the thing that made you, that made Peter and while I stood at the head of the beast, it was your maker that was leading the slaughter."

"Jasper was lost in the thing you turned him into, he was a good man and he is again."

"I was a good woman once too." Maria hissed at her. "Have I no right to redemption? Is my Major the only one allowed free from past sins? Do you suppose the ones left behind to those he slaughtered would feel as you do about him or would they view him the same as you do me?"

"Enough." Alice cut in, "Please." She turned to Charlotte, "You know Jasper doesn't want this."

Maria sighed, "I had thought we were beyond this Charlotte." Red eyes met black, "I can't change the past and I'm not one for regret but I do want us all to move on from the past, I am so tired of hate."

Charlotte's eyes changed slowly from black to maroon to vibrant red and she nodded, "I'm sorry Maria." Maria nodded and Charlotte sighed, "I hate seeing him like that, both of them."

"That was because of me." Bella reminded her, "Not Maria."

Charlotte gave her a weak smile and shook her head, "Forgive me Bella. Maria and I are friends of a sort, but she's right, we don't trust her as much as we want to."

"Trust takes time Charlotte, as vampires, we have plenty of it. Perhaps one day I will redeem myself in all your eyes and then you'll see, I'm not the same monster I was." Maria gave them a curt bow and left.

Charlotte just sighed and shook her head, "I'm going to get cleaned up. Do you know when they get back?" Alice shook her head and Charlotte nodded before disappearing down the hall and leaving Bella and Alice alone.

"So what now Alice?"

"Now it's up to you." Alice told her with a grim smile.

"What is?"

"The life, the family, you choose."

"What do you mean?"

"I can take you back Bella, we can tell your dad we ran away for a while and things will get back to normal. After some weeks, Dr. Carlisle Cullen will accept a job in some warm place and move his family away never to be heard from again by the people in Forks. At least not for a couple generations."

"You'll leave? You'll all just… leave?"

"Yes Bella, we have to and if it's what want, we can leave you. We don't want to. _I_ don't want to but if its what _you_ want, I'll take you home."

Bella licked her lips, face pale as she tried to fight off the panic and pain building inside her, "If I don't want that?"

Alice's smile was sad, "Then you don't go back, Bella Swan and Alice Cullen are runaways and bad things happen to young girls all the time."

"Will you change me?" Bella breathed.

"One of us will. When you're ready." Bella swallowed and nodded as Alice continued speaking, "You'd never see them again Bella. Not your friends or your parents, no one. You'd never see them or talk to them again."

"I'd be a Cullen?"

"If it's what you wanted."

Bella met Alice's eyes, she read sorrow and hope in them, she licked her lips again and nodded, "It's what I want."

"Bella…" Alice looked away and then back, fighting internally over her words, "We don't think Edward is your mate." She shook her head, "That's not true." She met her friends eyes, "Edward _isn't_ your mate."

Bella nodded absorbing the information, "Ok."

"Bella?"

"Ok." Bella repeated, "I still love you, all of you and I want to be with you and we can still be together, he and I, we'll just be companions, like you and Jasper."

Alice shook her head, "Bella…" Alice was waging that internal war again.

"Alice please."

"Whitlock."

"Sorry?" The name tugged at her memory and it took a moment for her to understand why, "The people in my dream? The name I go by as a vampire?"

"It's Jasper's name." Alice told her, her eyes never leaving Bella's.

"Jasper?" Bella repeated.

Alice nodded, "Jasper Whitlock head of the nomadic Whitlock Coven."

"Your Jasper?"

Alice shook her head no, "Peter and Charlotte's Jasper, pseudonyms The Major, Jasper Hale and Jasper Cullen, currently aligned with the Olympic Coven headed by Carlisle Cullen with former companion Alice Cullen but is actually, Jasper Whitlock… _your_ Jasper Whitlock." Alice gave her a wry smile, "The man you've been dreaming about… or trying not to dream about."

"Jasper?" Bella repeated. "Your Jasper?"

Charlotte came back into the room with Maria, having showered and donned a dress, the two women seemed to have completely moved past their earlier spat as their arms were linked and they were smiling. Though the smiles turned into looks of confusion in the silence of the room.

Turning to them and looking straight at Charlotte Bella demanded, "What's your name?"

"Charlotte?" She replied cautiously.

"Whitlock." Alice provided.

Bella shot her a look and focused back on Charlotte, who nodded, "Charlotte Whitlock."

"Mate of Peter Whitlock so named because he was changed by Jasper Whitlock." Alice added on.

"Jasper." Bella repeated disbelieving, "Your Jasper?"

"I believe he'd actually be considered, your Jasper." Maria provided with a chuckle.

"This is so _not_ funny." Bella spat.

Maria let out another laugh, "It really rather is."

"What's wrong with Jasper?" Charlotte hissed.

"Nothing!" Bella's face was pure shock as she stared at the angry vampire.

"Bella." Alice took her hand and pulled her to a couch, "I told you, Jasper and I aren't mates but I think maybe, well those dreams are blurry and you're afraid of what your subconscious is saying because you don't want to hurt me or Edward but I'm not hurt. I knew or at least figured it was a big possibility as soon as you said his name was in the dream. I wanted to be sure before I said anything or give you both the time to figure it out on your own, I was ninty percent sure though so I told Edward."

"You what?"

"I had to Bella, I couldn't let him fall in love with you if you weren't going to be companions. We all thought maybe you and he could be mates but doubted it and it didn't really matter because you'd be so good together. Companions like Jazz and I. So we wanted to be really sure before mucking things up with maybes. Then all this happened and I called Peter to see if he knew but he was about as sure as I was which was only about ninety percent then of course Jasper comes out and says so yeah maybe you just might be and that's why we're here."

"Jasper?"

"Jasper." Alice nodded and then sent her a blinding grin, "I just knew I would love his mate and we'd be best friends and I didn't think I could love anyone as much as you except for Jasper himself so its just perfect!"

"Perfect!" Bella hissed jumping up, "I may be your boyfriends mate!"

"Exactly!" Alice frowned at her, "How is that not wonderful?"

"He loves you! You love him!" Bella shrieked, "I maybe love Edward!" Bella bit her lip and frowned, "I know I love Edward. I do, I love him and he loves me."

"Yes." Alice agreed "And I love you and Carlisle and Esme love you and Emmett loves you and Rosalie will come to love you and you love all of them but Bella, Jasper is your _mate._ Once you fall in love with him, and trust me it wont take long, then you'll see, it's the strongest kind of love, the kind that can last forever."

"I love Edward… irrevocably and completely." Bella protested.

"You love the slightly controlling, often moody, brooding sides of him? The side that has him stalker watching you while you sleep?"

Bella opened her mouth and shut it again, "He just worries."

"Bella, Edward wouldn't have changed you, he likes testing his control by spending as much time with his singer as possible so he can feel superior to the rest of us, he does love you but its not the forever love of a mate."

"Its fascination with your silent mind and the draw of your blood." Charlotte supplied.

"You saw me a vampire." I reminded Alice.

"Yes and we all hoped you'd be his mate but you aren't so I don't think he'd have gotten over himself, over what we are and changed you."

"She saw you as a vampire because despite himself Jasper would have changed you." Maria added. "He can fight against his instincts all he wants but no vampire is strong enough to deny a mate forever. He'd have bitten you. You'd have bled near him or he'd feel a stray emotion in you and just for that split second his demon would rise and he'd have bitten you."

"Maria's right." Charlotte nodded, "If you truly are Jasper's mate, no matter how much either of you denied it, eventually you'd change."

"If I am?" Bella caught those words out of the rest, part of her still trying to deny the rest, "You still don't know? I might not be?"

"You are Bella." Alice took her hand making her look at her again. "Jasper, Peter and I are all almost positive."

"Almost?"

"Stop fighting the very notion and you'll know the truth of it yourself." Maria snorted making all the others turn to glare at her, "The Pixie Seer said herself, you've been having dreams of him and fighting them, because of her or Edward or fear, who really cares but stop fighting the dreams and then we'll see."

Bella glared at her and then sighed sinking into the couch again. "When do they get back?" She asked Alice.

Alice gave her a weak smile and sat as well seeking out a vision of Jasper. "He and Peter are on their way. Edward is with them."

Bella nodded and curled up on the couch letting her eyes close. She didn't sleep, just drifted in and out of consciousness while the three vampires talked quietly around her.


	3. Chapter 3

Finally male voices broke the quiet and Bella stretched getting up to face them. She startled at the sight of Edward standing angrily by Jasper and Peter but smiled tiredly in welcome at all three.

Edward frowned as he looked her up and down, "Are you alright?"

Bella yawned and nodded, "I'm good."

"What are you wearing?" Edward shook his head, "Alice." He rolled his eyes.

"Maria actually." Maria told him with a haughty look.

Edawrd gave her a disdainful look, "I can't believe they trusted you." He shot a disapproving look to Alice, "What were you even thinking bringing her here? Anything could have happened to her!"

"Maria wouldn't hurt her." Jasper said the words as though he'd already said them before.

Edward turned a disbelieving look on his brother, "You've really lost it if you believe that Jasper. That… that… creature is nothing more than a whore of satan. After what she did to you, after all the things she's done? I can't believe you let her in the same state as Bella! I specifically asked you to keep your blood thirsty _friends_" He shot a nasty look at Peter and Charlotte who was now in his arms, "Away from Bella and you invite them along on some family reunion at the house of the she-devil and then head off, leaving Bella with that psychotic bitch, to have some family bonding murdering joy-ride!" Edward turned to Bella who was staring at him in complete shock, "You should change into your own clothes and I'll take you home immediately."

Bella frowned at him, "No."

Edward gaped at her, "Bella."

"No." She shook her head and glared at him, "What gives you any right to speak to Jasper like that? To speak about Maria like that? What gives you the bloody right to make any decision about me for that matter? I like Peter and Charlotte and I like Maria and you know what? I like this dress and this house and I like that Jasper didn't just shrug off any concern I had about my parents getting hurt because _I_ got involved with vampires! I like that he didn't just force me into running away terrified, he made me feel safe and cared for and then he went out and took care of the threat to my life because knowing all of you brought that threat into my life!"

"Bella." Edward was gaping at her.

"Don't you Bella me Edward Cullen! I've taken care of myself since I was seven, now I'm seventeen I assure you I am quite capable of making my own choices and deciding who and what is good for me and can be part of _my_ life."

"Then what Bella?" His expression was cool, his eyes dark as he lifted one eyebrow, "You want to wear the dress home? Explain to your father why you ran off and came home barefoot in a couture dress? Looking like you've…" He waved her up and down, "You've stumbled out of some den of inequity!" He hissed shaking his head, "Or do you want the human drinking duo to bring you home? Or maybe the blood whore who lent that dress to you should go home with you and meet daddy? I'm sure he'd have a moment of pleasure in her company before she drained him."

"Edward!" Alice gasped, her brother was never that crude.

Bella just stared coldly at him ignoring Alice, her voice was calm and the words clear and presice. "I'm not going home Edward."

"Bella?" Jasper finally spoke but her eyes didn't move from the copper haired boy.

"I'm going to stay right here, in my borrowed couture dress with the woman kind enough to take me in while I was in trouble, clothe and feed me, and care for me." When his mouth opened to speak she cut him off, "You can save the rant about what a murderous bitch she is, even if Jasper and Peter and Charlotte didn't fill me in on their history, Maria told me hers and unlike them, she didn't care to hold back gory details for my piece of mind so I am certain to be haunted by the image of her ripping a child out of its mothers womb or Jasper tearing the heads of newborn vampires and tossing parts into the fire or the two of them having sex in a field of human corpses while vampires burned in pires around them." Bella shuddered but gave herself a mental shake and refocused, "Despite their… violent, histories. I don't judge who they are for who they were, not especially knowing what led them to those actions in the first place. Not that you would care." Edward opened his mouth to speak again but she ignored him and continued, "Oh it's no excuse, I think Maria's actions are abhorrent and part of me hates her for the suffering she inflicted on so many, Jasper and Peter especially, but you know what? I don't really have a right to judge. If I'd lived her life, maybe I'd be the same."

"Bella." Maria's voice was gentle and soft but cut through the silence that had fallen like a shout making everyone turn to her. Maria smirked but focused on the young human girl, "While, as I've mentioned, I'm open to having another sister, I couldn't have a human one, if you stayed, it would be as a vampire."

"No!" Edward hissed jumping forward to crouch between Maria and Bella.

Bella, surprised by the offer, if that's what it was, by Maria was even more shocked by Edward's actions. "I'm going to change anyways Edward. I've already gone missing. Charlotte's right. It's best for all of us if this happens now. There's less to explain for my parents."

He spun on me with a shocked and tortured look, "You don't have to change Bella." His look turned more fierce, "I won't let it happen. I'll protect you."

"Protect me?" She spat out with a frown, "Protect me from being with you? With your family?" She shook her head, "From making my own choices? Funny how the one deemed a psychotic bitch from hell is the only one who seems concerned with what _I_ might want."

"Bella," Edward shook his head, his expression pained and his voice gentle, like he was talking to stubborn child and barely holding onto his patience, "I love you Bella. I love you, to much, to let them do this to you. I know what Alice thinks but she's wrong, you're good and pure and beautiful and you need to stay human. Even if she were right we can't steal your life, you deserve to live, to grow old and have a family and I'll be with you. I won't ever leave you unless you asked me to Bella, I'd make sure you were safe from them."

"Safe from them?" Bella questioned, "From Alice?" At his nod her frown deepened, "From Jasper?"

"Bella, I don't know what Alice has said but she doesn't know for sure and it doesn't mean anything. She's wrong anyways. Jasper… I care about him, he's my brother but Bella, trust me, you are so good and pure and beautiful and human. You are supposed to be human and live a long and happy life. I'll make sure of it because I love you, all of you and your beautiful human existence, your pure soul. I won't allow them to take that from you, to change you."

"Won't allow it?" Bella snorted, "It's _my_ life, _my_ humanity and _my_ choice! _You_ don't get an opinion! _None_ of you do!" She snapped, "if Maria is the one nice enough to offer me the option, about what _I_ want to decide about _my _life and _my _humanity, well like her or not, she at least earns a little respect from me over the rest of you controlling asshats! So go home Edward. I'm staying right here with Maria and Charlotte and Peter and Jasper and Alice and if that means I become a red eyed Whitlock instead of a yellow eyed Cullen then fine, that is the choice I am willing to make for my future."

"Bella." Edward growled.

Bella opened her mouth to speak but closed it to swallow and lick her lips before shaking her head, all her anger had fled leaving only a sad emptiness in her soul. "I'm tired." She turned to Maria, "Is it alright with you if I take a nap in the room from earlier?"

"Of course." Maria nodded, a smile pulled at her lips but Bella couldn't read the expression on the woman's face.

Bella nodded and turned back to Edward, "I'm not going back Edward you can accept _my_ decision about my life or leave." With that she turned from the room and made her way back down he hall searching for the room she'd woken up in. She didn't bother to change as she curled onto the bed and slept.

The dream came again. This time the images were clear, she was a vampire, in the same cabin with its battered and comfortable furniture.

Charlotte was curled in a chair flicking through a magazine when Peter came in and winked at Bella before hauling his mate over his shoulder, making her giggle as he smacked her bum and carried her down the hall.

A deep chuckle caught her attention and she turned to see Jasper in the door, he was in worn jeans hanging low on his hips and his chest was bare, light glinted off thousands of scars and Bella wondered if her subconscious put them there from the stories or if they really scattered his skin like that. Her attention didn't stay on them long though, her eyes moving from their shine to the planes and curves of his chest and abs and the dips of his hipbones. She let the dream carry her away.

_"Jasper." His name was more of a moan. _

_Watching as she seemed to stalk him, his eyes darkened with each step she took nearer to him._

_"Darlin?" He quirked one brow and the corner of his mouth pulled up a little in the imitation of a half smile. Bella didn't respond. She leapt and he caught her in the air as her legs wrapped around those perfect narrow hips. "Ali will be back from from shopping with Rosalie soon." He reminded her in a low gruff voice._

_"Umhmmm." She acknowledged kissing along his jaw and nipping his ear making him groan. Jasper smirked and moved his head to capture her lips, taking control easily as she moaned into his mouth. He walked as he kissed her, turning them so her bum rested on the edge of a table next to the door, the bowl they kept there for keys in fell to the floor with a crash, the ceramic breaking. Both vampires ignored it as he shifted between her legs lining his erection up with her core and began rotating his hip as he kissed her. "Jasper." She moaned gripping his back as his mouth moved along her neck._

_"Do you know how much I love you?" He asked, flooding her with an indescribable feeling of warmth, of completion, it was devotion and adoration and lust._

_"This much?" She asked running a finger along his jean clad length._

_"More." He growled grabbing her wrist and tugging her against him again to rock against her._

_"Will we ever tire of it?"_

_"Love?" He asked his fingers sliding up her ribs._

_"Making love." She responded, pulling back a little to trace a scar on his collarbone. "How many decades until I don't ache with need for you? Until my every thought and desire doesn't revolve around you. Until you grow bored with me? When does the need to just be near you pass?"_

_"It doesn't." He promised leaning in to capture her mouth in a searing kiss before pulling back and looking deep into her eyes, "It doesn't end, this need." He rocked into her, "to love you, to have you with me, to be inside of you. Even if we fight, when we fight, I'll want you like this, need you like this." He flooded her senses with desire the lust all coated in the that same warm haze of love, devotion and affection, "You're everything Bella. You'll always be everything for me, I'll always be everything for you."_

_"Promise." Bella moaned rocking against him._

_"Always." He growled kissing her deeply again, his long fingers tangling in her hair, tilting her head back as his tongue plundered her mouth and his hips rocked into hers._

Bella woke with a start and sat up before flopping back onto the bed with a groan and closing her eyes. She opened them again, only she didn't, she knew she was dreaming by the way the sun coming in the room was glinting off her diamond skin.

_Looking under the silky sheet she saw her dress was also gone, replaced with a long fingered hand on her boob, tweaking her nipple. Following the arm to a shoulder and up to Jasper's face before her eyes raked down his nude form. The sheet and the way he was laying on his side covered his penis from view and she knew in that same place in the back of her mind, the part that knew she was dreaming, she was embarrassed, should be embarrassed but was also immensely curious._

_"Bella!" Maria's voice called._

_Jasper groaned, "You had to become friends with the crazy bitch."_

_"Jasper." She admonished whacking him as Maria came in the room, eyes roaming Jasper and making a possessive growl rumble in Bella's chest._

_Jasper quirked an amused eyebrow, "Want to leave and never come back?"_

_This made her laugh again and shake her head, rising nude from the bed and turning to Maria, "Eyes off my mate grandma."_

_Maria snorted and laughed waving her hand, "As you like my dear but really what's the harm in looking? With complete and perfect recall I can envision exactly what he looks like, feels like, tastes like" Her voice trailed off at Bella's growl but she just grinned, "Come now you know you're going to forgive me, because he's all yours, every delicious inch of him and all I have are bitter sweet memories to keep me warm at night."_

_Bella snorted, "And a variety of lovers both human and vampires."_

_Maria gave a lascivious grin, "True. Said lovers need a break though and I do believe you promised me a girls week. Alice just arrived with Rosalie and says Charlotte will be here in only a few minutes. Esme is meeting us in Ibiza since she's already in London with Carlisle so it's time to go!"_

_"Alright alright." Bella laughed already pulling on clothes. She leant over the bed and kissed Jasper deeply, "See you in a week."_

_Jasper sent a wave of lust through her, "Stay." He whispered._

_Bella laughed and kissed him again. "Bella!" Alice shouted entering the room._

_"Let's go. Up. Now. I had to leave Emmett, you have to leave Jazz." Rosalie ordered. Jasper ran a finger over her ribs sending a shiver through her. "Don't be a pain Jasper." Rosalie glared at her pretend twin but there was no heat behind it._

_"Fine." Jasper play growled, "Go," He told kissing her, "but the things I'll do to you when you get back will shock even Maria." Bella purred as she ran her nose along his jaw and up to his mouth for another kiss._

_"HELLO!" Charlotte called from the hall._

_"We're here!" Alice called happily as they came into the room._

_"No, no more women in here with my naked mate!" Bella huffed jumping off the bed and grabbling a slip dress, pulling it swiftly on, "Let's go."_

_"We've seen him naked." Charlotte reminded her with a smile as she came in._

_"Half of us have more than seen him." Maria snorted._

_"OUT!" Bella shouted, not quite able to hold back giggles._

_"Hell of a welcome sis!" Charlotte admonished pulling her into a hug._

_"ME TOO!" Alice cried and they opened their arms to include her. _

_Rosalie snorted, "Alright let's go."_

_"Please." Maria huffed._

_Bella laughed letting them drag her down the hall, happiness filled every corner of her being even as a small part of her heart already missed the blonde coybow. "Love you!" She called back._

_"Love you." Jasper responded coming down the hall after them and leaning against the wall to watch them leave. _

_Bella looked back and saw him standing in low slung jeans, barefoot and shirtless looking edible. Bella groaned but let the girls tug her out of the mansion and into a waiting limo. Life could never be better than this. She thought laughing with her sisters as they headed off on another adventure._

Bella startled awake with the rumble of the engine and glanced around her before shaking her head and flopping back down.

This time when she closed her eyes she dreamt she was sitting in a park, her skin didn't glow, her mom was laughing with Phil's arm around her as a little boy showed them a rock, she couldn't hear what they were saying but his features were animated as he waved his arms and pointed, his skin was tan, his features clearly native and yet he looked like Bella too.

_A man sank to bench beside her in a deputy uniform, "Bells."_

_"What are you doing here?" She demanded._

_"Lunch." His voice was instantly clipped and hard. "Charlie and I went to the diner and he wanted to stop and see the kid." He motioned to where her father was now kneeling down with the animated boy. _

_"Rachel Black to busy today?"_

_"Jesus Bella, do we have to do this again? Now? Here?"_

_"Did you have to fuck her?" She spun angrily on him, "My best friends sister?"_

_"I told you, nothing happened last weekend." He hissed. "It was one time before we were married."_

_"Really?" She snorted in disbelief and anger._

_"It was five years ago Bella. I'm sorry. How many times do I have to tell you I'm sorry. I knocked you up and we got engaged, I was nineteen! I got scared and messed up. Are you going to make me suffer for the rest of our lives?"_

_"You fucked her, you were engaged to me, your pregnant girlfriend!"_

_"It was five years ago." He snapped._

_"Daddy?" A small voice interrupted their hissed conversation._

_"Hey Buddy." He turned to his son a smile stretching his beautiful mouth._

_"Are you fighting again?"_

_"No." He lied shaking his head, "We were just trying to decide who got to tuck you in tonight."_

_"Gramma said I could stay in the hotel with her and Grumpa tonight."_

_Bella stood and kissed her father's cheek as he came over with her mom and Phil, "You're taking Chris tonight?" She asked her mom._

_"We thought you and Paul needed a night." Her mom smiled at her, the look in her eyes knowing. _

_Phil grinned, "And we want more time with our grandson!" He was still young enough to be the boys father himself, the idea always made Bella laugh._

_"Please mum?" The little boy looked up at her, "We're going to have pizza and see a movie and I can have a milkshake!"_

_"Have fun." Bella laughed with her mother. Phil just shook his head and grinned lifting the boy onto his shoulders._

_They watched them walk to a car before Charlie turned to them with a frown, "Why don't you take the rest of the afternoon off son. The two of you can spend some time together. Talk."_

_Bella rolled her eyes but kissed his cheek, "Paul and I are fine Charlie."_

_Charlie shook his head and sighed, "Well I don't need the man power today so take it anyway." He told his deputy. _

_"We aren't fine Bella." Paul told her dropping back on the bench._

_Bella sighed and sank down beside him, "I didn't want to be a mother."_

_"I know." He nodded._

_"I didn't want to stay in Forks."_

_"You hate the rain."_

_"I know it was five years ago but I only found out five days ago Paul."_

_"I know and I'm sorry Bella. I'm so fucking sorry. I was an idiot but I love you."_

_"I know you love me. I love you too and I love our son. More than I thought it was humanly possible to love a person but Paul, all we do is fight, all we've ever done is fight."_

_"We make up pretty good though." He reminded her, making her fight a smile even as tears burned her eyes. Paul groaned and rubbed a hand over his cropped hair, "I'm sorry. I am. Truly. I fucked up. So what do you want Bell? Now that you know does it change things? You want to leave me?"_

_"No." Bella sighed and rolled her eyes shaking her head, "I do love you Paul, I love our son and I want what's best for him. I want us to stop fighting. I want to stop being angry with you. To stop seeing you fucking her every time I close my eyes. I want, I want the impossible."_

_"What? Go back in time and never be with me?"_

_"Do you really love me? The forever kind of love, like Jared has?"_

_"We were happy Bella, we can be happy again."_

_"That's not an answer."_

_"Love like that is rare, most people don't get it. What we have, its real, its messy and we have shit days but we have a great kid and we can be happy again. We have a good life together Bella, maybe not some fairytale bullshit stars in our eyes mushy movie worthy love and our foundation is a bit rocky from the surprise kid but maybe he's what makes our foundation strong now, five years of hard work to make us a family for him."_

_"What about when he grows up then? When he goes off to school, to live his life?"_

_"We'll still be family then too." He reminded her with a wry smile. _

_Bella fought an answering smile and shook her head, "Idiot."_

_"I'm going home, I'm going to change out of this uniform pick up our kids shit and make us dinner. You are going to go into the diner and have a cup of coffee, read one of your books and relax, pick up a bottle of wine and come home to me. Tonight, we aren't going to fight. We aren't going to talk about the past or our relationship or our amazing kid. We're going to have dinner, watch a movie and I'm going to make love to you, and we're going to remember we were good together before we were a family. Tomorrow we'll pick up our kid and take him to the beach and remember we are great together as a family. After that, well we'll have to take it one day at a time until you are ready to completely forgive me" He sighed and kissed her temple before standing up and walking towards the parking lot._

_Bella watched him walk away and wanted call out and stop him, to go after him but as she opened her mouth a face surfaced in her memory. Jasper. _

_Why had she left him all those years ago? Where was he now? Where was Alice? Did they think about her? Did they miss her as much as she missed them? _

_She loved her son, so much and Paul was a good man, a bit hot headed but no matter how they fought he was good to her and so good with their son, she loved him, in a way and he was right, they had a good life together. It just wasn't the life she wanted, this wasn't the family she was meant to have. She wanted to go back to the life she'd turned her back on and she hated herself for it. Hated that part of her still longed for that other life she could have had with the quiet warrior she'd not let herself fully love. Paul deserved better than half her heart, Chris deserved more than a mother who never wanted kids but no matter how much she loved them, loved her beautiful little family and their quiet life in cold rainy Forks, she still missed the Cullen's, still longed for Jasper and the love she'd been to afraid to accept was possible._

Bella jolted awake, tears streaming down her cheeks and an ache in her chest. She bounced out of bed and went into the bathroom to wash her face. The kohl that had rimmed her eyes was streaked down her cheeks so she washed her face and tried to calm her racing heart. She padded back into the bedroom and peeked out the door but the house was silent.

"Alice?" She called in soft voice.

"You know vampires don't sleep don't you?" Maria asked her with an amused smile, "You don't need to whisper and tiptoe."

Bella smiled back as her shaking her head, "Right. I'm not sure why I was trying to be quiet. Where's Alice?"

Maria rolled her eyes and moved down the hall before looking back and quirking an eyebrow as though saying 'well come on'. Bella shook her head but followed after her.

They returned back to the same sitting room, it looked almost as if no one had moved, except for Maria who'd clearly been in one of the rooms near Bella and Jasper.

"Where's Jasper?" Bella turned to Maria with a frown.

"You asked for Alice." Maria reminded her.

"Now I'm asking about Jasper."

"Are you alright darlin?"

Bella flushed and turned to Jasper, as he came inside, snapping his phone shit and sliding it into his back pocket. "Can you take off your shirt?" He wasn't the only vampire in the room who looked surprised at the request. "Please." She forced herself to meet his eyes, her cheeks flaming red.

Jasper nodded slowly and pulled the long sleeved tee over his body, his expression carefully blank and his eyes on the wood of the floor.

Bella gasped as she took in the sight of his lean pale torso a familiar pattern of scars tracing over his skin. As in her dream her eyes moved quickly from the raised half moons to the hard planes of skin and contours of muscle, from broad shoulders to narrow hips and the little dip of his hipbone just above his low-slung jeans. She licked her lips as she remembered where that dream had led, where it would have led if she hadn't woken up and he imagination flowed into the next dream of what had surely happened before Maria interrupted it from happening again.

Bella licked her lips, realizing she was short of breath as she tore her eyes away from him and up to his eyes, they had gone black but his smile, it was part amused, part dirty promise and part uncertainty.

Her body pushed forward but she hesitated after the first step before gathering her courage and walking the few feet across the room to him. She lifted a hand and traced the scar she'd traced in her dream.

She forced herself to look up again into his black eyes, "Darlin?" He asked again. His voice low and gravelly, warm whiskey.

She licked her lips trying to catch her breath, "I don't want to live my life regretting not loving you." He frowned at her in question, "I dream about you." She sighed and admitted, "I didn't want to dream about you. I don't want to do that to Alice. I never want to take you from her. I don't want to lose her."

"You wont Bella." Alice's soft voice assured her not breaking the almost trance she was in staring into Jasper's black eyes, her hand moving from the one scar along others of its own will.

"They're just dreams darlin."

Bella shook her head, "Peter and Charlotte are real but I think I dreamed them because I saw them in a picture, with you and Ali, in Carlisle's office." She shook her head again, "but I think Maria might have been one of the shadows and I didn't know she existed. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe that part of the dreams doesn't matter. Wasn't real. This wasn't in a picture though. This I just knew, maybe I've seen the one on your arm before and just didn't remember but I've never seen you shirtless," Her fingers traced back up to the scar. "These scars, I thought I might have made them up from the stories, but this one, this one is exactly the same as in the dream."

"Bella." Edward's voice was pained and pleading.

She finally tore her gaze from Jasper and turned, "I think I was right."

"Bella?"

"I did fall in love with and I could fall in love with a human," Bella shook her head, dispelling the hope in his eyes, "But I don't want that life. It wouldn't be fair not to me, to you or to whatever family I made because I'd always miss him, want him, regret not loving him." Bella licked her lips again, "I never fit Edward. Not anywhere. Not with my peers or my parents. I had no real place to belong before. Then I met you and I fit, Edward. I belong in this world, part of your family, part of this family because I belong with him." She shook her head, "Even if I don't love him yet, don't know him very well yet. He belongs with me and I belong with him. Forever." She felt him step closer to her and a hand settle on her hip, the feeling is oddly familiar and comforting but new and exciting.

"She's made her choice Edward." Jasper's voice is hard as stone, but he sends her wave of calm and affection.

Edwards eyes are pleading, "You don't understand the choice you're making Bella."

"I know what I'm giving up, and I know its only for the possibility of the life I want" she shakes her head, "But I'm still choosing it."

"Come on Edward." Alice steps forward and takes his arm before turning a blinding smile on Bella and Jasper, "I'm sure we're right Bella. Peter and I both think so and you and Jasper clearly feel something of the pull too. I might not _see_ it for sure and he might not yoda _know_ but we're right. You're going to love each other. I love you both so much, I just know you're meant for each other."

"I love you." Bella bit back tears and smiled back at her best friend.

"No tears." Alice laughed, "I'm taking Edward home. Charlie needs to see him in Forks."

"What about me? I mean, officially?"

"We'll take care of that." Alice promised moving forward to hug her and kiss Jasper's cheek. "You and Jasper just, get to know each other." She laughed waggling her eyebrows. "You'll never doubt the choice."

"Great." Bella snorted, "Already with the you and Maria had him first references."

The vampires all stilled in shock again, Alice letting out a bubble of laughter and Maria snorting out a sharp laugh of her own unable to hold it in once Alice laughed.

"Now what?" Charlotte asked after the two had left.

"You're all welcome to stay." Maria offered offhandedly.

Bella frowned at her, it was the second time Maria had invited her, them, to remain. "You're lonely."

"Don't pity me human, I'm Satan remember."

Bella snorted, "I believe Edward said you were Satan's Whore and you admitted Jasper was your demon and you were all violent blood thirsty terrifying vampires who protected one little human from a tracker while playing dress up." She motioned to the couture dress she still wore and then frowned, "I think Alice stole your dress."

Maria shrugged, "Clothes I can replace, it was her size anyways."

"It was." Bella frowned, "That dress was perfectly her size."

Maria rolled her eyes, "I like to shop. We aren't close but the four of them do visit."

"That room I'm in is Jasper's isn't it? That's why in my dream we're in it, not because it's the only room I've slept in here but because it's his room."

"Your dream was located here?" Maria frowned at her, all of them look stunned again.

"One of them was." Bella nodded, "We were meeting Charlotte, Alice and Rosalie here for a girls vacation, Esme was going to meet the five of us too."

"You dreamt about being in my house and going away on vacation with me?" Maria reiterated the question.

"Yes but the point is that is Jasper's room. He has a room and I bet Charlotte and Peter do to."

"Of course they do." Maria rolled her eyes, "I told you, they visit."

"How many times, since you got this house?"

"Three, maybe four."

"Three or four?"

"This is the fourth." Maria admitted exasperated, "What is your point?"

"How long do they stay?"

"A few days."

"They stay a few days but you keep permanent rooms for them?"

"You are very pushy little human. Did you have a point? This is a very large estate, why shouldn't I have rooms for my children?" Maria frowned at the sound Charlotte made, "Jasper and Peter were with me a century Charlotte, whatever you or they think of me not every single moment of every single day over those years was hateful."

"You love them." Bella smirked at her, "You love Jasper and Peter and you want them back, not to dominate territories but so you aren't alone." Bella frowned, "Alice doesn't like to be alone either."

"No, she doesn't." Maria agreed and then glared at the other three vampires again, "She might have been angry with me over Jasper but when he decided to try to let all that go she stopped trying to hate me. I might not go so far as to claim friendship but perhaps I can be bold enough to say we've cultivated a friendly acquaintance and she emails me about Jasper."

"She knows you miss him." Bella grinned smugly.

"So." Maria lifted her chin haughtily, "Is it a crime? I spent a century with him."

"Maria." Jasper's voice was gentle.

"I'm not deluded Jasper. Though my sanity is somewhat questionable at times I'm not so ridiculous as to hope for more than our continued co-existence in the world and occasional visit."

"Well so long as we leave out the blood, death and destruction. Seems to me a longer visit wouldn't be so out of the question." Peter shrugged, "What would you say Charlotte?"

"If Peter ruins your furniture it's not my fault." Charlotte warned Maria with a smirk.

"You're going to stay?" Maria asked them shocked.

"Not forever." Peter shrugged, "Imagine heres as good a place as any for a new born though. What with all three of us being somewhat skilled in the creation and training of one."

"Minus the fighting, death and destruction bit." Charlotte shrugged.

"Jasper?" Maria questioned nervously.

"It's up to Bella."

Bella shot a look to him but his expression was unreadable. She looked at Peter who looked a bit bewildered and torn between hope and fear. Charlotte looked wary but calmly accepting and just nodded at Bella. Maria... when Bella looked at Maria she saw fear and hope and longing. She saw the girl Maria must have been long ago, before Rico and her parents had been stolen from her, leaving her alone in the world, alone and broken, angry and afraid.

"I want to stay." Bella decided without hesitation. Maria shone with such joy at her words, the beauty of her almost hurt to look at.

That unadulterated hope and joy, the emotions Jasper finally let himself feel from her, to believe and share with Peter and Charlotte healed something in all of them. Bella couldn't help but smile as she gazed around at her new family, her coven.

"What is it?" Jasper whispered tugging her against his chest.

"Just missing Ali."

He sent a wave of comfort and affection, "Ali and I are never apart long Bella. She'll be back soon. You and I together won't change her relationship with either of us."

"Are we together?"

"I suppose once you're a vampire and I stop wanting to kill you we will be. Especially if we're truly mates."

"We are." Bella sighed happily leaning back against him.

"Do you want time or should I kill you now?" He whispered, his voice teasing but the question serious too. Was she really ready?

"Bite me Cowboy." She chuckled tilting her head a little. His breath against her neck sent a shiver down her spine, it was a chill of anticipation and lust and just a little bit of fear. He kissed her pulse and bit.

**Ok so I can end it here or write more, post change but I haven't gotten much to go on in reviews so I don't really know if people love it or hate. The impression is pretty indifferent to it so I might just leave it here. I tend to prefer to to all be loving or love-hating my writing and I've been in a weird place for a while, not writing. I think I might be losing my touch. We'll see if I can motivate myself to write more here. I do feel like there is more to their story but not sure yet so I'll leave it as incomplete and give it a couple days.**

**For those who have reviewed thank you. Special note goes Princess Mishawaka. I think you've read most if not all my stories because I recognize you from other reviews. Thanks for sticking with me the last couple years! Mad love to you! **

**I hope I can start writing some good stories again. I have ideas but not much seems to come out of my fingers when I put them to the keys. **


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